Living on earth would become difficult in the future. So, more money should be spent on researching other planets to live, like Mars. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is true that
,
Remove the comma
apply
earth
would become more difficult in the distant upcoming years. Henceforth, some more capital should be allocated to Add an article
the earth
research
as an
alternative planets to live, like Mars. I partially agree with Correct article usage
apply
this
statement I will address why I decide
Wrong verb form
decided
this
position for the following reasons.
To commence with, living Change preposition
on this
our
Change preposition
on our
earth
planet
already face
many Correct subject-verb agreement
faces
challanges
Correct your spelling
challenges
due to
ozone
layer Correct article usage
the ozone
is
affected. Wrong verb form
being
This
means in the future
people will not have earth
Capitalize word
Earth
planet
to live,
Change preposition
on, which
which
pollution, water scarcity, natural calamity and melting ice cubes of polar that lead to we need Correct pronoun usage
apply
another
Change preposition
for another
planet
to live such
as Mars, so the government should spend more funds for
Change preposition
on
space
research
, and as a result
, future
folks will have a planet
to live. For example
, the USA and Russia have spent a higher amount to
Change preposition
on
space
research
in
every year. Needless to say, these kinds of Change preposition
apply
expriments
will bring numerous benefits to the Correct your spelling
experiments
future
as well as
present
Correct article usage
the present
days
.
Fix the agreement mistake
day
In contrast
, existing living planet
should be protected by spending more money rather than Fix the agreement mistake
planets
research
of
other planets. Change preposition
on
This
means earth
Capitalize word
Earth
planet
has more resources and all facilities
to live but an alternative Correct article usage
the facilities
planet
is required
Wrong verb form
requires
to
more capital for Change preposition
apply
research
whether
people live Change preposition
on whether
or
not. Rephrase
there or
For instance
, third-level countries do not allocate money for space
. expriments
Correct your spelling
experiments
instead
of they spend money to protecting
Wrong verb form
protect
earth
from natural Add an article
the earth
disaster
and pollution. Fix the agreement mistake
disasters
Hence
, more funds should not allocate
to Wrong verb form
be allocated
space
analysis.
In conclusion, indeed space
research
needs more funds, so the authority should be spent. This
bring
more benefits to the Change the verb form
brings
future
mankind
. Even though, Change preposition
of mankind
earth
Correct article usage
the earth
planet
needs bulk
amount to prevent and protect our living habitual planets. Correct article usage
a bulk
Therefore
, I partially agree with this
statement and I hope certainly
Correct pronoun usage
it certainly
this
Correct pronoun usage
apply
bring
numerous benefits to society.Change the verb form
brings
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task achievement
Try to provide more specific and relevant examples to support your points. This can help clarify your arguments and make them more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Work on organizing your ideas in a clearer and more logical manner. Use paragraphs to separate different points and ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea.
task achievement
Improve the clarity and comprehensiveness of your ideas. Make sure each point is well-explained and logically developed.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to the flow of your essay. Use transitional phrases to link your ideas and ensure a smooth progression from one point to the next.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in framing your essay well.
task achievement
Your essay addresses both sides of the argument, showing a balanced approach to the topic.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example
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