In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Owning a
home
or renting a
home
sometimes can be a serious problem in many families.
However
, there is a common view on housing
issue
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
show examples
in some countries that owning a
home
is way better than renting
one
.
This
essay
aim
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aims
show examples
to explore the reason why so many
people
consider
owing
Correct your spelling
owning
show examples
a
house
as
such
a big deal. There
several
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are several
show examples
reasons why having
an
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your
show examples
own
house
property looks so important.
Firstly
,
owing
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owning
show examples
a
home
represent
Correct subject-verb agreement
represents
show examples
a sense of belonging, which means it will be more comfortable and free to stay in a property that
all
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is all
show examples
to yourself. And
compare
Wrong verb form
Compared
show examples
to
this
sense of freedom, living in a rented
house
may have a lot of restrictions,
such
as changing the decorations, moving furniture and having pets. In
this
circumstance, it will be hard for
people
to feel the place like
home
. Another reason is that
owing
Correct your spelling
owning
show examples
a
home
is more stable than renting
one
. In China, most
of
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apply
show examples
people
consider a big deal about having a family and a stable life, especially the
old
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older
show examples
generations among the
family
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families
show examples
. And
owing
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owning
show examples
a
house
takes a big part of these two goals, because it's steadier and the family don't have to worry about moving around. To define whether it is a positive or negative situation, I think it depends on the stage of
one'
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one's
show examples
life. For
the
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apply
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middle-age
Correct your spelling
middle-aged
show examples
and old
people
and
also
the
Correct article usage
apply
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young parents who have kids, it is wonderful to
owe
Verb problem
have
show examples
a
home
. In that case, old
people
and kids can have a stable relationship with their community, we all know
that
is't
Correct your spelling
isn't
painful for kids to transfer to another school and for old
people
to
saying
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say
show examples
good bye
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goodbye
show examples
to their old
friend
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friends
show examples
.
However
, for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
young
people
, having a
house
may not be
such
appealing.
For most
Correct word choice
Most
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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young
people
can't afford a
house
by
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with
show examples
their deposit, so if they need to buy
one
, they have to ask for loans. And many
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
young
people
are
no
Correct your spelling
not
show examples
willing to have
such
a huge burden at a
such
young age, so renting a
house
might be a better choice for them. In conclusion,
owing
Correct your spelling
owning
show examples
a
home
is a sense of belonging, but it should not become a burden. No matter which way you live, the most important point is to choose
according to
your own situation.
Submitted by fiasngs on

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task achievement
Try to ensure that your ideas and points are fully developed in each paragraph. For example, explore more reasons and consequences for owning or renting a home.
coherence cohesion
Work on the logical structure of your essay. Some points seem to be repetitive or can be better organized. Ensure a smooth flow between your paragraphs and main points.
task achievement
You have presented a complete response to the task and addressed both the reasons for preferring home ownership and your viewpoint on whether it is positive or negative.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, making it easy for the reader to follow your argument.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • ownership
  • renting
  • importance
  • sense of security
  • stability
  • financial investment
  • asset
  • customize
  • decorate
  • belonging
  • community
  • potential
  • future generations
  • long-term
  • cost advantage
  • control
  • living space
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