IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

Is it good for children to start using computers from an early age and spend long hours on them? Discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In recent years,
children
Use synonyms
, like adults, have become increasingly exposed to
computers
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
 some child psychologists have claimed that
this
Linking Words
 is a good thing, others have claimed that it has an overwhelmingly detrimental impact on
children
Use synonyms
. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I shall draw upon a number of studies in cognitive science and industrial psychology that reveal the positive and negative aspects of the phenomenon.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, there are clear reasons why
computers
Use synonyms
 do not allow
children
Use synonyms
 to develop long attention spans.
This
Linking Words
 is because
computers
Use synonyms
 are packed with many supposedly child-friendly games that require minimal levels of concentration in order to be enjoyed.
For example
Linking Words
, a study by the New York Child Learning Association found that
children
Use synonyms
 who read from picture books were 50% less likely to get distracted than
children
Use synonyms
 who played educational computer games.
Hence
Linking Words
,
computers
Use synonyms
 almost certainly have a negative impact on young
children
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, since the world has become heavily reliant on
computers
Use synonyms
, there are
also
Linking Words
 clear advantages to exposing
children
Use synonyms
 to
computers
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 is because
children
Use synonyms
 with
such
Linking Words
 exposure will stand a better chance of finding employment.
For instance
Linking Words
, after being interviewed by Yale psychologists, over 70% of young office workers admitted that they had spent long hours on
computers
Use synonyms
 in their middle and late childhood years.
Therefore
Linking Words
it is clear that
Linking Words
 computer exposure can be beneficial to
children
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, there are advantages and disadvantages to early computer exposure.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, if, in the future, the quality of educational gaming is increased, there is good reason to believe that these negative consequences will fall entirely away.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Strengthen your argument by providing more concrete examples and data to support your points further. While the essay covers main points well, more detailed evidence can enhance the argument.
task achievement
Keep an eye on the balance between the positive and negative aspects. Ensure you provide a well-rounded discussion, maintaining a balanced view between the advantages and disadvantages.
coherence cohesion
Improve on providing a varied sentence structure to make your essay more engaging. This will also help in ensuring the clarity and flow of your points.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction clearly outlines the topic and the stance, setting a good context for the discussion.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and provides a forward-thinking perspective, enhancing the overall argument.
logical structure
Logical sequencing of paragraphs with clear transition words enhances readability and flow.
supported main points
Main points are well-supported with relevant examples, which adds credibility to the arguments.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
    What to do next:
    Look at other essays: