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Band 3

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

#countries #home #people #be #case #situation
There is a widespread ideology that owning a house is better than renting one.
This
 essay will discuss the causes of
this
trendency
Correct your spelling
tendency
 and elaborate on my opinion for
favoring
Change the spelling
favouring
show examples
 the negative side of
such
situation
Correct article usage
a situation
show examples
.
Firstly
, it can be admitted that
economical
Replace the word
economic
show examples
 instability affects the financial capability of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
individuals to buy their own
home
Fix the agreement mistake
homes
show examples
.
For instance
, the house nowadays costs not less than 900,000 dollars.
Moreover
, it requires allocating
budget
Correct article usage
a budget
show examples
 for
maintanance
Correct your spelling
maintenance
 and redecoration.
Thus
, renting a house is the best choice in
this
 case.
Nevertheless
, going beyond
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
material considerations
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
allows more freedom in moving on from
place
Correct pronoun usage
one place
show examples
 to another.
For example
, when you have a better chance
for work
Change preposition
of working
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 in
other country
Change the wording
another country
other countries
show examples
 you do not have to worry about where you live.
Furthermore
,
this
 fosters potential prospects in your career and future.
As a result
, having your own home does not mean
that is
suitable
Add an article
a suitable
show examples
 decision for all people. In summary,
this
 is a controversial topic with different views. From my perspective, I totally agree that the drawbacks of owning a home outweigh the pros.
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task achievement
While the essay addresses the prompt, the arguments can be better developed with more detailed supporting examples and explanations.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that the ideas and paragraphs flow smoothly. Improved transitions between ideas and paragraphs can enhance readability and coherence.
coherence cohesion
Avoid minor spelling and grammatical errors such as 'trendancy' and 'maintanance'. This will help to improve overall clarity and presentation.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion which help frame your discussion well.
task achievement
The essay covers various aspects of the topic, such as financial considerations and personal freedom, showcasing a good understanding of the prompt.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • ownership
  • renting
  • importance
  • sense of security
  • stability
  • financial investment
  • asset
  • customize
  • decorate
  • belonging
  • community
  • potential
  • future generations
  • long-term
  • cost advantage
  • control
  • living space
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