In many countries people of all ages do sports and exercises a lot. Does this trend have more advantages or disadvanatges? Give reason for your answer and include examples from your own experience and knowledge.

In multiple nations, nowadays
people
of all ages are practicing all
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
show examples
of
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
activities
,
this
essay
believes that
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
show examples
outweigh
drawbacks
Correct article usage
the drawbacks
show examples
.
Practicing
Change the spelling
Practising
show examples
a comparison, we can enumerate many advantages.
To begin
with,
people
are healthier as they are
practicing
Change the spelling
practising
show examples
physical
activities
. On top of that, individuals are happier, since
sports
are a natural antidrepesives and
finally
, the
community
become much more social, as many
sports
are
practiced
Change the spelling
practised
show examples
in a group,
therefore
individuals can build a trust relationship with other ones. Analyzing the other side,
this
essay
cannot see or notice any disadvantage related to
this
trend.
Firstly
, is important to highlight the positive aspects related to
this
trend.
People
are healthier, when a person
practice
sport
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
a regular basis, he/she becomes
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
an active person,
as a
result
Add the comma(s)
result,
show examples
they will suffer
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
ills
associate
Wrong verb form
associated
show examples
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
age,
for instance
,
people
who never
practice
sport
in their life will have more chances to get cardiovascular issues. In Germany,
for example
,
insurances
Fix the agreement mistake
insurance
show examples
pay
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
for
practicing
Change the spelling
practising
show examples
sports
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
a daily base,
as a
result
Add the comma(s)
result,
show examples
they engage with the
community
making them
practice
activities
and companies get a cost and risk reduction of future ills. On top of that,
people
become more social, in countries
such
us
Correct your spelling
as
show examples
Norway and Iceland, individuals tend to be close,
however
, when they are motivated by
sports
they enjoy joining a
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
club.
As a result
, many of them can generate trust relationships through
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sports
.
Finally
,
community
Correct article usage
the community
show examples
tend to be happier when they
practice
sports
.
This
is because physical
activities
generate
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
dopamine’s
Change noun form
dopamine
show examples
release,
therefore
, when a person
practice
sports
weekly they feel more confident
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
themselves and with extra energy. On the other side (drawbacks),
this
essay
cannot see any negative
aspect
Fix the agreement mistake
aspects
show examples
around the world of
this
trend.
To conclude
,
this
essay
strongly
affirm
Change the verb form
affirms
show examples
that advantages are much more than disadvantages, as we mentioned before, if a country has
people
who enjoy
practicing
Change the spelling
practising
show examples
exercise, they will have a happier, healthier and more social
community
. Every country should try to
incentive
Correct your spelling
incentivise
show examples
this
behavior in order to generate a positive impact in their society.
Submitted by tomasmutilva99 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Ensure that your essay has a clear and identifiable thesis statement which captures the main idea.
task achievement
Make sure to address both sides of the argument equally, even if you ultimately choose one side.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples and evidence to support your points more convincingly.
coherence cohesion
Use transitional words and phrases to improve the flow between sentences and paragraphs, enhancing coherence.
coherence cohesion
Check for minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasing.
introduction conclusion present
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion.
logical structure
The main points are well-organized and follow a logical structure.
relevant specific examples
Good use of specific examples from countries like Germany, Norway, and Iceland.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cardiovascular health
  • Chronic diseases
  • Mental well-being
  • Teamwork
  • Social interaction
  • Risk of injuries
  • Overtraining syndrome
  • Physical fitness
  • Stress
  • Fatigue
  • Accessibility
  • Inequality
  • Health disparities
What to do next:
Look at other essays: