Some people say that the idea of having a career with one company is an old-fashioned one. To what extent do you think having several different jobs or career is better than a career with one company?

#people #idea #career #company #jobs

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Nowadays, the concept of having multiple

career

options is a new trend with several advantages like multiple

income

sources, a secured future, and a better lifestyle. I strongly agree with

this

psychology as it inspires the individual to grow continuously in his/her

career

Firstly

, having more than

one

job

gives you financial security as an individual has multiple sources of

income

and

benefits

to hold long-term expenses

such

as purchasing a home, having a new car, or securing fixed deposits for their future. The statistics show that

people

having multiple jobs have more purchasing power as compared to others having a single

job

one

earning source.

Moreover

, layovers on a

job

impact a single

career

holder more than

people

with more than

one

job

. To secure yourself from unknown financial burdens or stress, it is better to explore more

career

options rather than depending on

one

employer.

Furthermore

, maintaining a better lifestyle requires a reliable source of

income

. In

past

Correct article usage

the past

show examples

people

Wrong verb form

did

show examples

have government jobs which comes with

job

security and a fixed

income

with other

benefits

However

Add a comma

However,

show examples

in today's scenario, no

job

will give you a

gurentee

Correct your spelling

guarantee

of lifelong stability.

On the other hand

, having

one

job

is not sufficient to bear the

day to day

Add a hyphen

day-to-day

show examples

expenses of a household.

Thus

people

incline

Wrong verb form

are inclined

show examples

towards different opportunities and offers for financial stability.

Altough

Correct your spelling

Although

, working with

one

company makes you reliable and gives more

benefits

Correct article usage

the

show examples

long-term

Correct your spelling

long term

show examples

, it requires a lot of dedication,

loyality

Correct your spelling

loyalty

and solidity. In conclusion, I can say that working with more

then

Correct your spelling

than

show examples

one

company gives you financial

benefits

as well as

upbring

Correct your spelling

upbringing

your

career

and lifestyle

whereas

to bond with

single

Correct article usage

a single

show examples

company requires more dedication of time and work.

Submitted by amarjot755 on Fri Jul 12 2024

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evidence strengthening

Provide more specific examples or statistics where possible to strengthen arguments. For example, mention particular fields or job roles where multiple jobs are more prevalent.

grammar review

Review grammatical errors and improve sentence structure to enhance clarity. For example, 'lays off' should be used instead of 'layovers', and 'guarantee' instead of 'gurentee'.

structure

Clear introduction and conclusion which help frame the essay effectively.

coherence

Logical flow of ideas with each paragraph focusing on a different reason why having multiple jobs could be beneficial.

balanced view

Addresses both the benefits of multiple jobs and the potential benefits of staying with one company, providing a balanced view.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

284 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Diverse skill set
Adaptable
Versatile
Professional network
Networking opportunities
Career stagnation
Fresh challenges
Motivated
Engaged
Earning potential
Negotiation skills
Compensation packages
Flexibility
Personal growth
Career aspirations
Fulfillment
Risk management
Financial troubles
Downsizing
Safety net

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Some people say that the idea of having a career with one company is an old-fashioned one. To what extent do you think having several different jobs or career is better than a career with one company?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Obesity is an ever-growing pandemic that is affecting more and more of the world’s population. The number of people who are at risk of serious health problems due to being overweight is increasing. What is the reason for the growth of overweight people in society? How can this issue be resolved?

Nowadays, families are not as close as in the past and a lot of people have become used to this. Why is this happening? Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the drawbacks?

Government investment in the arts, such as music and theatre, is a waste of money. Governments must invest this money in public services instead. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that the media have to right to publish detail of people’s view, while other thinks it should be controlled. Discuss both views.

In recent years, there has been a rise in the popularity of second-hand clothing amongst the younger generation. Why is this happening? Do you think it’s a positive or negative development?