Nowadays more and more people want to get things done instantly. Why is it? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

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It is true that today everything can be gained easily, and
this
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causes
people
Use synonyms
to have
strong
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a strong
show examples
desire to finish things instantly . There could be several reasons for
this
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, and I consider it to be a negative trend. In
modern
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the modern
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era,
technology
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development is growing very rapidly. It provides a lot of convenience for
people
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in all sectors. Nowadays there are a lot of mobile applications in digital platforms that provide most human needs.
For example
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,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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people
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do not need to go to
market
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the market
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and cook. They can order some food from food delivery services just with several clicks . In another case,
people
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do not need to create manual
design
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designs
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to build their
house
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houses
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, because there are a lot of digital design applications
in
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on
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their
device
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devices
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.
Thus
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,
everyone
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it
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is very possible to be an architect .
Also
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, in
communication
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the communication
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sector,
the
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apply
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technology
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allows us to meet anyone from various parts of the world without meeting directly. In my view,
this
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phenomenon presents several detrimental effects
to
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on
show examples
the
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apply
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people
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. Convenience in various lines
cause
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causes
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less creativity and appreciation for the process, creating unproductive
people
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. They will become lazier, and do
less
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fewer
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physical movements.
Thus
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,
this
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can have an impact on reducing
the
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apply
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human health quality.
In Addition
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, it
also
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influences human psychology, where they will rely on the digital platform. They will face
any
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apply
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troubles if they are in some places that are left behind in
technology
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.
Lastly
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,
development
Correct article usage
the development
show examples
Use synonyms
technology
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of technology
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make
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makes
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individuals have less interaction. As
social
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a social
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being, direct interaction is needed. In conclusion, the trend of wanting instant processes occurs
due to
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A and B. For me,
this
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brings undesirable consequences
such
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as C and D, which should be considered.
Submitted by k a l l a on

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coherence
Your essay could benefit from a clearer structure with distinct paragraphs dedicated to each point. For instance, one paragraph discussing the reasons for instant gratification and another discussing its negative implications.
language
Make sure to proofread your essay for minor language errors, such as verb tense agreement and prepositions. For instance, 'development technology' should be 'technological development' and 'have less interaction' should be 'interact less'
task response
You could enhance your task response by providing more specific examples or evidence to support your claims. For example, beyond mentioning food delivery services, you could discuss specific impacts on societal behavior or health statistics.
task response
Your essay effectively addresses both parts of the prompt, identifying reasons for instant gratification and discussing its negative implications.
coherence
Your introduction and conclusion are clear and provide a good framework for your essay.
support
There is a good attempt to provide examples and explanations for the points raised, which helps in illustrating your arguments.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • instant gratification
  • rapid advancement
  • instant communication
  • online shopping
  • fast food delivery
  • social media platforms
  • immediate feedback
  • recognition and validation
  • efficiency
  • productivity
  • convenience
  • decreased patience
  • delayed gratification
  • realistic expectations
  • work ethic
  • unrealistic expectations
  • stress
  • dissatisfaction
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