The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparions where relevant.
The graph shows the comparisons of the old and new
shops
from each year. It’s stated that the number of shops
each year has been either terminated or still running, 2011 is the year that 9,000 shops
have been reportedly closed every day, and store
owners
didn’t have the debt to keep their places running so the best way to deal with this
situation is to close the shop.
In 2012, has also
had the same problem as Its shops
were declining a lot and no new shops
were beginning to open, It’s not a good start for store
owners
to see their stores
declining. Jump forward to 2018 new stores
have recently opened and it’s getting better and better, while
recent shops
have dropped significantly in recent days. From 2015 a lot of stores
were in critical condition and 1000 shops
were closed because of the recent debts store
owners
were struggling to pay. Furthermore
in 2016, many Add a comma
Furthermore,
shops
were dropped again, and now rarely other shops
now are open because of the time there.
In conclusion, from 2011 to 2018 shop owners
struggled to keep their stores
running while
some are likely able to do, hence
I think this
is a lot of issue for opening a shop because they have to make more money and bring ideas to attract more customers into their shops
and bring business. However
it is unlikely that new Add a comma
However,
shops
are struggling to keep their finances, but store
owners
need to pay their debts to ensure their shops
can keep going on well.Submitted by kelly on
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Contractions: Don't use contractions.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 69%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words shops, store, owners, stores with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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