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Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Some people think that universities should provide graduates with the knowledge and skills needed in the workplace. Others think that the true function of a university should be to give access to knowledge for its own sake, regardless of whether the course is useful to an employer. What, in your opinion, should be the main function of a university?

#people #universities #graduates #skills #workplace #function #university #access #sake #course #employer
It is argued by some that universities should value educational courses and skillsets associated with future career enhancement,
while
 others say that the primary objective of a
university
 should be to provide knowledge irrespective of whether it is effective or not. I am inclined towards the first point of view rather than the second one because students can get high-paying jobs and can excel in their field based on their expertise. Imparting learners with knowledge and training for a specific work field helps them seek a monetarily rewarding job.
This
 is to say that by attaining a piece of up-to-date technological information and tools for a workplace, they can earn high remuneration.
Furthermore
,
this
 will allow them to perform at their best in their industry.
This
 is because they will be able to get high positions on the basis of their skill sets.
For example
, most of the educational institutions in the United States and Europe design their courses that are relevant to be applied in real life for making money.
On the other hand
, giving educational material to students for own sake of the
university
 requires no investment in the hands of the
university
.
This
 implies that the
university
 does not have to invest capital to install modern technology and update teaching pedagogy. Professors will teach those irrelevant subjects that they have been teaching for years.
For instance
, in many universities in Pakistan, adequate resources for learning and training are lacking.
Therefore
, pupils just cram notes and books rather than applying them in different industries.
To conclude
,
sole
Add an article
the sole
show examples
 purpose of a
university
 is to help students make a handsome amount of money after completing graduation rather than teaching them for their own benefit.
Submitted by durefishan4455 on

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Introduction & Conclusion
Your introduction provided a basic setup for the essay. However, it could have been strengthened by outlining your main points more clearly.
Supported Main Points
The essay tends to repeat points rather than develop them fully. Ensure that each body paragraph expands on a unique aspect of your argument.
Logical Structure
The essay has an overall logical structure, but paragraphs need to flow more smoothly. Improve transitions between paragraphs.
Introduction & Conclusion
The conclusion summarizes the essay's argument but falls short on reflecting on the implications or considering a broader scope.
Complete Response
Your response only partially addresses the task. You need to explore both views more comprehensively before giving your own opinion.
Clear & Comprehensive Ideas
The ideas presented need to be explained more clearly with better argumentation and justification.
Relevant & Specific Examples
While you have attempted to provide examples, they should be more relevant and specific to the point being made.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Lifelong learning
  • Holistic development
  • Vocational training
  • Industry-specific competencies
  • Critical thinking
  • Creative problem-solving
  • Academic research
  • Intellectual development
  • Ethics and values
  • Societal contribution
  • Job market demands
  • Practical training
  • Internships
  • Knowledge advancement
  • Global challenges
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