Holding International games such as The Olympic Games is an exciting event. Some people think that it has positive effects while other argue that it is a waste of money. Discuss both sides of view and give your own opinion.
The Olympic
games
are held every four years. It is an extremely thrilling event, highly organized, and large sums of Use synonyms
money
are spent on Use synonyms
this
occasion. In fact, Linking Words
while
some people appreciate every aspect of it, others believe that it is a giant waste of Linking Words
money
.
On the one hand, the Olympics are an expensive occurrence and an economic boost. Use synonyms
Furthermore
, Linking Words
money
is spent in order to create shows and make commercials. Use synonyms
Moreover
, the host cities are enhanced by upgrading public transportLinking Words
,
and building new infrastructures and sports facilities. Remove the comma
apply
Thus
, the cities experience a rise in tourism. Linking Words
Also
, urban development benefits local communities even after the Linking Words
games
. Use synonyms
In addition
, many jobs are created and the local business is stimulated. Linking Words
For example
, Linking Words
this
year the Olympics are hosted in Paris, where a lot of visitors are travelling.
Linking Words
On the other hand
, the economic boost and the job opportunities are often temporary, and once the Linking Words
games
are concluded, there might be limited long-lasting benefits. Use synonyms
For instance
, many infrastructures could be underused and forgotten and could become a waste of Linking Words
money
. Use synonyms
Consequently
, the construction projects and the influx of tourists could lead to urban degradation, Linking Words
such
as pollution, waste management issues and the destruction of natural habitats. Linking Words
Besides
, other areas, including healthcare and education, could not receive the necessary funds in order to function properly.
Linking Words
To conclude
, I believe the Olympics are a great event, which brings many advantages, Linking Words
such
as urban development. Linking Words
However
, sometimes large sums of Linking Words
money
are wasted on infrastructures that are forgotten once the Use synonyms
games
are concluded.Use synonyms
Submitted by chi63hi
on
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introduction conclusion present
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supported main points
Your main points are well supported, but try to provide more specific examples to strengthen your arguments further. For instance, mention exact figures or case studies to give a more concrete foundation to your points.
logical structure
The logical structure of your essay is good, but pay attention to the flow between sentences. Using more transitional phrases could improve cohesion. For example, words like 'therefore', 'furthermore', and 'consequently' make your arguments smoother.
complete response
While your response is complete, aim to elaborate more on each point to provide a deeper analysis. This shows a clear understanding of the topic.
complete response
Your essay effectively discusses both sides of the argument and then clearly states your opinion in the conclusion. This shows your ability to understand and address the task requirements.
clear comprehensive ideas
You have clear and comprehensive ideas that address the question. Your paragraphs adequately explain the benefits and drawbacks of hosting the Olympics.
coherence cohesion
Your choice of vocabulary and sentence structure effectively convey your arguments and show a good command of English.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?