IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Modern societies need specialists in certain fields, but not others. Some people therefore think that governments should pay university fees for students who study subjects that are needed by society. Those who choose to study less relevant subjects should not receive the government funding. Would the advantages of such an educational policy outweigh the disadvantages?

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In
this
Linking Words
 cutting-edge era,
education
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 is an integral part
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 our lives.A Lot of
subjects
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 are included in
Use synonyms
education
Add an article
the education
show examples
 system,which helps to decide our future.Nowadays , society
required
Wrong verb form
requires
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
specialised
people
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 in a particular field.Few folks
are believe
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believe
show examples
 that society
wanted
Wrong verb form
wants
show examples
 some study
subjects
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 ,which should be provided by the government
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
free of cost .
People
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 who are selected irrelevant
subjects
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 should not receive any benefits from the ministry.I strongly opine that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
this
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 notion has
disadvantages
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 than
advantages
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.
This
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 essay will articulate
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 predominant
advantages
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 and
disadvantages
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 in forthcoming paragraphs,
along with
Linking Words
 a relevant conclusion. To commence with,free
education
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 is beneficial for students especially ,the children with poor economic status.
This
Linking Words
 helps them to achieve their goal.
Moreover
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,
specialization
Correct article usage
the specialization
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 of
subjects
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 will help to mitigate the labour shortage.To epitome,
Correct article usage
the health
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health care
Correct your spelling
healthcare
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 industry
facing
Wrong verb form
faces
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
myriad issues
due to
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 understaffing.
Recetly
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Recently
,
people
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 are selecting nursing courses,which will help to minimize employee
deficit
Fix the agreement mistake
deficits
show examples
.
Therefore
Linking Words
,it helps them to run their institution smoothly.
Secondly
Linking Words
,it has both
advantages
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 and
disadvantages
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 as well.If
authority
Correct article usage
the authority
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 offers free
education
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 for selected
subjects
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,
Correct pronoun usage
it which
show examples
which makes
Wrong verb form
will have
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negative
Add an article
a negative
show examples
 impact on other students, who are selected
less
Change preposition
as less
show examples
 priority
subjects
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 .Because the cost of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
schooling is
cannot
Verb problem
not
show examples
 affordable for poor families.
Linking Words
Consequently
Add a comma
Consequently,
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 students have
Fix the infinitive
to
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focus on important
subjects
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 and
loses
Change the verb form
lose
show examples
necessity
Correct article usage
the necessity
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 of remaining
subjects
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and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
causes
Wrong verb form
causing
show examples
Correct article usage
a lose
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lose
Replace the word
loss
show examples
 of jobs among teachers.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,the government will impose higher taxes on citizens .
For instance
Linking Words
,the European countries provided free
education
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 for all , but they
charge
Wrong verb form
charged
show examples
 high taxes on humans.Which will affect less
income
Correct your spelling
low-income
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 families.
To conclude
Linking Words
,free
education
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 on selected
subjects
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indicate
Correct subject-verb agreement
indicates
show examples
 positive and negative impacts on youngsters.
Besides
Linking Words
 that,For the tax
payment
Add a comma
payment,
show examples
people
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 have to work
hardly
Change the word
hard
show examples
.In my opinion ,
this
Linking Words
 notion has
disadvantages
Use synonyms
outweigh
Correct pronoun usage
that outweigh
show examples
 the
advantages
Use synonyms
.

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clarity of ideas
Work on the clarity of your ideas. Some of the sentences are not entirely clear, and this affects comprehension. Make sure each point is clearly stated and supported with relevant examples.
vocabulary and sentence structure
Try to avoid overusing certain words or phrases, as it can make the essay repetitive. Vary your vocabulary and sentence structure to keep the reader engaged.
proofreading
Make sure to proofread your work to correct any grammatical errors or awkward phrasing. Attention to detail will improve the overall quality of your essay.
introduction conclusion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps to frame your arguments effectively.
balanced arguments
You have done well in covering both advantages and disadvantages, providing a balanced view on the topic.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • economic efficiency
  • allocate resources
  • job market
  • unemployment
  • underemployment
  • skill gap
  • critical sectors
  • financial incentives
  • societal needs
  • potential for resentment
  • undervalued
  • academic performance
  • overspecialization
  • diversity in skills
  • cultural development
  • holistic societal growth
What to do next:
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