Many countries have compulsory military service for young men after they leave school. It would be a good idea for all countries to adopt this system for men, and possibly for women too. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?
It is often argued that all nations should implement military services on young males and females after finishing their education.
This
essay will disagree with this
statement because it can lead to migration and some people's interests may lie somewhere else.
On the one hand, one major factor disadvantage is that it could lead to a rise in the number of migrating students after finishing school. People can be forced to migrate to escape from mandatory services they may not wish to join. For instance
, in the year 2000, Lebanon adopted this
system for males after finishing their education. Consequently
, a significant amount of families who had boys had to migrate to other countries to avoid them from joining the military.
On the other hand
, another drawback to making this
service an obligation is that it may not be in one's interest. Some ambitious students would like to finish their secondary education and would like to pursue a career in areas of their interest without wasting time. For example
, individuals who may wish to study arts and science would be less likely to serve in the army. As a result
, valuable time would be lost in activities they are not interested in and they could have invested in subjects they desire and are beneficial to their future.
In conclusion, in my opinion, the movement of serving in the army should not be obligatory as it would be a waste of time for students who can gain skills and experience in areas of their preference and It can also
lead to a significant amount of people leaving their home country.Submitted by sara.elkhansa on
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task response
Ensure a more balanced discussion. A robust evaluation would benefit from considering potential benefits as well as drawbacks of compulsory military service.
coherence cohesion
Improve transitions between paragraphs to enhance overall fluency. Use linking words and phrases to make the essay flow more smoothly.
task response
Provide more specific and detailed examples to strengthen your arguments. This will help in making your points more convincing and clear.
coherence cohesion
Good structure with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. This helps in maintaining coherence.
task response
The essay addresses the topic with relevant ideas and maintains focus throughout the response, demonstrating a strong task achievement.
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