​​Schools should use films, computers and games instead of books. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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There is a controversial perspective heating up a debate
whether
Change preposition
about whether
show examples
schools should use media
form
Fix the agreement mistake
forms
show examples
consisting of films, computers, and games in lieu of
books
. In my point of view, it is ideal to combine both technological and traditional methods in learning methods. Without a shadow of a doubt,
books
play a significant role in learning.
This
is
due to
the fact that traditional
books
contain a wealth of information on various subjects, synthesized by professionals in the field of education. To be more specific, parents tend to encourage children to read more
books
to expand their knowledge and set up their independent thoughts.
Hence
, it is necessary for students to acquire knowledge through
books
.
On the other hand
, it is obvious to note that learning through modern technologies is of the essence in a fast-paced society. The explanation for
this
is that teaching methods by facilities
such
as films, computers and games make learning more enjoyable and interactive. To be particular, with vivid images and graphics, learning for students will become more accessible
instead
of traditional
books
that only focus mainly on content and words.
Thus
, using technological devices in learning is vital at school nowadays. In conclusion, even though using movies or games in education enhances the joyfulness and the interaction of the students, the use of traditional
books
also
develops their life skills.
Submitted by hominhtrang995 on

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introduction conclusion present
The essay's introduction is effective in laying out the debate and stating the writer's stance, which is to combine both traditional and modern learning methods. The conclusion also effectively summarizes the main points. Remember to ensure that every main point is fully supported with clear and relevant examples to strengthen your argument.
logical structure
Your essay has a logical progression of ideas and is generally cohesive. However, the use of certain transitional phrases and connectors can be improved to enhance the flow of the argument. For example, use more linking words like "Firstly", "Additionally", or "Moreover" to clearly connect your points.
complete response
The essay addresses the task and provides a balanced view, discussing the importance of both books and modern technology in education. However, providing more specific examples or case studies could improve the credibility and depth of your response.
clear comprehensive ideas
While the ideas presented are clear, they could be expanded upon in greater detail. For instance, discussing real-life examples or studies that show the benefits of using modern technologies in education could make your arguments more compelling.
relevant specific examples
To increase the relevance and specificity of your examples, consider integrating more concrete instances showing the impact of both traditional and modern learning tools on student performance.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction is well-crafted, clearly stating the topic and your viewpoint.
complete response
The essay maintains a good balance of discussing both sides of the issue, which shows a comprehensive understanding of the topic.
introduction conclusion present
Your conclusion effectively encapsulates the main points of your argument, summarizing both the benefits of modern learning tools and traditional books.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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