Nowadays many people choose to be self employed rather than to work for a company or organisation. what could be the disadvantages of being self employed?

These days,
Correct article usage
the businesmen
show examples
businesmen
Correct your spelling
businessmen
ratio
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
been increasing
tremendou
Correct your spelling
tremendously
tremendous
more than ever before
due to
globalization. Many people prefer to be businessmen
instead
of working under the employers. There are some
drawback
Fix the agreement mistake
drawbacks
show examples
of being
Self employed
Add a hyphen
Self-employed
show examples
, and
this
essay discusses it briefly for the following reasons.
To begin
with, a lack of financial stability is the primary disadvantage of
this
phenomenon.
This
is because
business
has ups and downs, so people cannot earn a fixed amount
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
every month, and sometimes they neither get profit nor earnings. For example, many small-scale entrepreneurs have more debts because
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
they do not acquire a fixed amount for their
expenes
Correct your spelling
expenses
expense
. Needless to say
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
, being
self employed
Add a hyphen
self-employed
show examples
is not a
gurantee
Correct your spelling
guarantee
of earnings constantly, they face more difficulties in their lives.
Furthermore
, businessmen work hard, they should work more time, and give more effort to
acheive
Correct your spelling
achieve
business
but if they work as employees in any
organisations
Fix the agreement mistake
organisation
show examples
, they should
be worked
Wrong verb form
work
show examples
only eight hours without any
efforts
Fix the agreement mistake
effort
show examples
.
For instance
,
according to
survay
Change the capitalization
Survay
show examples
, many businessmen have gotten
divorce
Wrong verb form
divorced
show examples
because
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
they spent more time
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
improving
business
Correct pronoun usage
their business
show examples
rather than spending time with family members.
That is
, family
relationship
Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
show examples
might be affected when a person
to
Add a missing verb
is to
show examples
be earned by
himselved
Correct your spelling
himself
.
Hence
,
self employed
Add a hyphen
self-employed
show examples
mankind's first
prefference
Correct your spelling
preference
for
business
after that family and other things. In conclusion, being entrepreneurs rather than working under any companies
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
brings some
disadvantags
Correct your spelling
disadvantages
disadvantage
, namely they do not earn a fixed amount
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
every month
like
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
as
employee
Correct article usage
an employee
show examples
as well as
they put more
efforts
Fix the agreement mistake
effort
show examples
to develop
Change preposition
into developing
show examples
their businesses
while
they might lose their family relationships. There are the
disadvantars
Correct your spelling
disadvantages
of being
self employed
Add a hyphen
self-employed
show examples
rather than working as employees.
Submitted by reanudeepan on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Consider refining your thesis statement to clearly outline the specific disadvantages you will discuss. This helps set clear expectations for the reader.
task achievement
Ensure that each main point is clearly connected to the overall topic and directly addresses the question of disadvantages of being self-employed.
coherence and cohesion
Work on improving sentence structures and grammar to make your essay easier to read and understand. Avoid run-on sentences and grammatical errors.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words and phrases more effectively to connect ideas between sentences and paragraphs (e.g., 'Firstly,' 'Moreover,' 'As a result').
introduction and conclusion present
Your essay contains a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps create a structured response.
relevant specific examples
The examples provided are relevant and illustrate your points, enhancing the overall argument.
supported main points
You have identified two key disadvantages of being self-employed, which are both relevant to the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: