Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Nowadays, there are more and more
children
occupying
Verb problem
spending
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too much
time
on their gadgets. The causes of
this
kind of trend are
lack
of control from their
parents
and influences from their classmates. I believe that
this
is a negative development
,
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apply
show examples
since it can
cause
several health problems and a decline in their interpersonal
nskills
Correct your spelling
skills
. First and foremost, the major
cause
of the increasing number of hours
children
occupied to use their gadgets is
due
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apply
show examples
to
lack
of
parent's
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parent
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control
in
Change preposition
over
show examples
their activities. These days,
parents
are getting busier than
the
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in the
show examples
past.
In other words
, dads and moms are both having their own full-
time
jobs,
while
in the past, only fathers were pursuing their
career
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careers
show examples
. If there is no control from their
parents
,
children
may tend to play all their
favorite
Change the spelling
favourite
show examples
games on mobile phones
whole
Correct article usage
the whole
show examples
day.
Furthermore
, their classmates
also
play a pivotal role in their attitudes towards
such
a technological tool. Spending their
time
too much on social
medias
Correct your spelling
media
show examples
,
for instance
, is required to fit in their circles so they can always catch up with the latest trend among their circumstances.
Such
a phenomenon is a sign of a negative development. In terms of health
condition
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conditions
show examples
,
such
a trend can damage their eyesight
due to
phone's
Correct article usage
the phone's
show examples
brightness.
Therefore
, there is no doubt that in a classroom, there are more
children
wear
Correct pronoun usage
who wear
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eyeglasses rather than those who do not.
Furthermore
, choosing to spend most of their
time
on gadgets will make their lifestyle too sedentary. In fact, it may
cause
obesity
to
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apply
show examples
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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, which can lead to chronic diseases,
such
as heart attack and cardiovascular disease, in the near future. In terms of social lives,
moreover
, kids will become more shy and
lack
of
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apply
show examples
communication skills when meeting people in real life, since they are used to
socialize
Wrong verb form
socialising
show examples
online
instead
of meeting people in person. In conclusion, the
causes
Fix the agreement mistake
cause
show examples
of
such
a phenomenon is caused by the diminishing
time
of
parents
looking after their child's activities throughout the day. Another
cause
of
this
kind
os
Correct your spelling
of
show examples
issue is the influences from their peers.
This
is a sign of a negative development
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
since too much
time
on smartphones can damage their health condition and make them
lack
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
communication skills.
Submitted by michellyonggo on

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • smartphones
  • usage
  • technology
  • accessibility
  • convenience
  • entertainment
  • gaming
  • social media
  • communication
  • educational resources
  • addiction
  • dependence
  • negative effects
  • physical health
  • mental health
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