Some people think universities should provide knowledge and skills related to a future career; others believe the proper function of the university is to give access to knowledge for its own sake. What is your opinion of the primary part of the university?

Tertiary education is expected to give
knowledge
and
skills
related to
future
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
show examples
by
Change preposition
to
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others
while
some believe that they should impact
knowledge
for its own
sake
. In my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
show examples
they should train and provide information
that is
related to
future
Add an article
a future
show examples
career
. More details will be alluded
in
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to in
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the essay below.
Firstly
,
university
Correct article usage
a university
show examples
education is the
last
step before one starts working so the
need
Correct article usage
a need
show examples
to provide
skills
that
helps
Change the verb form
help
show examples
in one's
career
. The reason why people go to
universities
is to be trained to be good at what they will be
practicing
Change the spelling
practising
show examples
in the
future
so the need to train professionals in different fields. More importantly, the
university
programs
are given specific names in order to attract people interested in that field so it was designed to provide specific
career
knowledge
. Other
universities
offers
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offer
show examples
science
programs
only
while
others are just business
universities
so they are sorely designed to give a guideline to the
future
career
.
For
instance
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instance,
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Chinhoyi
University
of Zimbabwe offers only
science related
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science-related
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programs
like Medicine, Engineering etc which
matches
Correct subject-verb agreement
match
show examples
with
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apply
show examples
the
career
of a Doctor and that of an engineer. With
this
kind of program naming
it is clear that
they should give
knowledge
for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
future
careers.
However
, a
university
is a
money making
Add a hyphen
money-making
show examples
entity as well so it can give
knowledge
for its own
sake
. Advertising that they can offer certain
programs
that they are not capable of offering will lead them to give access to
knowledge
for its own
sake
. One can
then
argue that it is no justification to offer
knowledge
for its own
sake
because the main purpose of their existence is to give a guideline to the
future
career
so in my opinion all
universities
should provide a guideline
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
the careers ahead. In conclusion,
knowledge
and
skills
are taught before the actual transference of it in real life so
universities
save as that bridge
universities
are to give
skills
that
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
related to
future
careers.
Submitted by sisalt100 on

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coherence cohesion
To improve the logical structure and coherence, consider using clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph. Also, ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next.
coherence cohesion
Strengthen the introduction by clearly stating the main points you will discuss. This will help guide the reader through your essay.
task achievement
Incorporate more specific and detailed examples to support each main point. This will make your arguments more compelling and credible.
task achievement
Clarify and elaborate on the reasons why some people believe universities should provide knowledge for its own sake. A more balanced discussion could enhance the essay's depth.
task achievement
Your essay presents a clear stance on the issue, indicating that you believe universities should provide career-related knowledge and skills.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, which helps to frame the essay and provide a sense of closure.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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