People attend college or Universities for many different reasons (for example new experience,career preparation,increase knowledge etc). Why do you think people attend colleges or universities?
Universities
were once visited for career
preparation, whereas
nowadays, people attend univerities
for different Correct your spelling
universities
reasons
. In this
essay, I will discuss the many different reasons
why people attend universities
.
In the past, the main reason to attend universities
was to Fix the agreement mistake
university
further
one´s career
. Universities
provided the necessary credentials that were needed to apply for job vacancies and teached
the necessary skills to be Correct your spelling
taught
succesful
in the chosen Correct your spelling
successful
career
path. By coming into contact with peers, this
provided valueble
networking opportunities as well, which would be practical in later life.
Correct your spelling
valuable
Likewise
, today, there are many other reasons
for attending universities
. The experience
of living on your own,
can lead to personal growth. The fact that a young person has to develop critical thinking, Remove the comma
apply
self discipline
to be able to study every day, and independence, by living away from his parents. Add a hyphen
self-discipline
Therefore
making those years a transformative experience
for the individual.
Furthermore
, the collaborations with collegues
on tasks can broaden one´s view on things and lead to an unexpected change of view on many topics of life. Correct your spelling
colleagues
For example
, coming into contact with persons who lived
in a Wrong verb form
live
complety
different region of the country, or who have different Correct your spelling
completely
on
opinions on recent political issues can be a driver for personal growth.
Change preposition
apply
Overall
, I can conclude the reasons
today for attending university today are much more multifaceted than they were in the past. In addition
to preparing for a future career
, one can experience
personal growth by being indepent
for the first time. Correct your spelling
independent
Furthermore
it can be a transformative Add a comma
Furthermore,
experience
by broadening one´s view of the world.Submitted by laurens.belgium on
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Coherence and Cohesion
The logical structure of your essay is excellent overall. Your essay transitions smoothly from discussing past reasons for attending university to current motivations, helping maintain a clear and coherent argument. However, adding more specific examples could further strengthen and clarify your points.
Task Achievement
While you covered the task's requirements and provided a well-rounded analysis, adding more clear and concise examples can help in illustrating your points more vividly. Consider expanding on key details that demonstrate unique reasons for university attendance today, which will aid in making your argument more convincing.
Task Achievement
There are a few grammatical and spelling errors that should be addressed to improve the overall quality of the essay. For example, 'teached' should be 'taught,' 'valueble' should be 'valuable,' and 'collegues' should be 'colleagues.' Careful proofreading can enhance your writing's clarity and professionalism.
Introduction and Conclusion
Your introduction and conclusion are very strong and effectively encapsulate your main ideas. They provide a clear framework for your essay and leave a lasting impression on the reader.
Coherence and Cohesion
You have used a variety of sentence structures and vocabulary effectively, which adds depth and interest to your writing.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.