IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Some people think that instead of preventint climate change, we need to find a way to live with it. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #preventint #climate #change
Climate
change
,
also
 called
warming
Correct article usage
the warming
show examples
 of the earth, is the most urgent matter we face as humanity today, as many people say. We ought to find solutions to
this
 problem,
while
 others say the solution
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
climate
change
 is impossible.
Therefore
 we have to find ways to live with
this
 situation. I will discuss both views and give my opinion.
The
Change preposition
In the
show examples
last
 few years,
scientist
Fix the agreement mistake
scientists
show examples
 have been warning us about the negative effects of greenhouse gasses, which lead
the
Change preposition
to the
show examples
 warming of the earth. There are arguments
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
that we should try to mitigate these problems by
livestyle
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
 changes.
For example
 the reduction of the use of fossil fuels, by changing our mobility. Cars running on gas or diesel could be forbidden and replaced by
battery fueled
Add a hyphen
battery-fueled
show examples
 cars.
This
 would lead
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
 a reduction
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 fossil fuel usage.
Furthermore
Add a comma
Furthermore,
show examples
 there are options available to make the heating of our houses more energy efficient.
This
 could be done by isolating our walls and roofs more, by installing solar panels
who
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
 would capture solar energy, a clean form of energy which would
results
Wrong verb form
result
show examples
 in reduced emissions in the long run. There are many countries which have opted for
this
 route, like Germany, which is a pioneer in the transition to a
carbon neutral
Add a hyphen
carbon-neutral
show examples
 country.
On the
contrary
Add a comma
contrary,
show examples
 there are people saying we should not try to prevent
climate
change
, but rather live with its effects.
Thus
 needing to
tranform
Correct your spelling
transform
 our infrastructure so to be ready for
this
Correct pronoun usage
these
show examples
 changing living conditions. Countries strongly impacted by
climate
change
, like the Netherlands, are already thinking about necessary alterations to their famous sea walls, which will need to
be build
Change the verb form
be built
show examples
 higher to cope with rising sea levels.
Similarly
, desert countries like the UAE
for example
,
also
 are experiencing today the negative effects of the changing
climate
. Droughts followed by record numbers of rain led to
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
catastrophic flooding of the city of Dubai in recent times.
Submitted by laurens.belgium on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Ensure all parts of the prompt are addressed in detail. Include a clear standpoint regarding the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement.
task response
Proofread your essay to correct minor grammatical errors and ensure consistent verb tenses.
coherence cohesion
Organize paragraphs more logically; ensure that each paragraph supports a main idea.
task response
Provide more specific and relevant examples to support your points. Examples strengthen your argument.
task response
The essay has a clear introduction and addresses both perspectives.
coherence cohesion
The logical flow of ideas is generally clear.
task response
Use of relevant information like the case of Germany and the Netherlands helps contextualize the discussion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • climate change
  • adaptation strategies
  • mitigation efforts
  • sustainability
  • renewable energy
  • greenhouse gas emissions
  • drought-resistant crops
  • sea levels rising
  • extreme weather events
  • carbon footprint
  • environmental impact
  • future generations
  • vulnerable populations
  • economic implications
  • transitional strategies
  • resilience
  • long-term
  • irreversible impacts
  • moral responsibility
  • sustainable development goals
What to do next:
Look at other essays: