Shopping is the favorite pastime for most of the young people. Why do you think is that? Do you think they should be encouraged to do some other useful activities?

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Shopping is

the

Correct article usage

show examples

favorite

Change the spelling

favourite

show examples

pastime for many young generations. As a youth, I admit it. Shopping is

such

Linking Words

an activity that can make

people

Use synonyms

feel

relax

Wrong verb form

relaxed

show examples

from everything that

disturb

Change the verb form

disturbs

show examples

them.

However

Linking Words

, it is

stil

Correct your spelling

still

important to

doing

Change the form of the verb

show examples

other useful activities. For young

people

Use synonyms

, shopping can be a way to express how they love themselves or as a reward. By doing shopping,

people

Use synonyms

can

temporary

Change the adjective

temporarily

show examples

get out

from

Change preposition

show examples

their work. Sometimes

people

Use synonyms

are

Verb problem

apply

show examples

just

going

Wrong verb form

show examples

around at a department store, seeing the products they want

Change preposition

apply

show examples

without buying

Correct pronoun usage

them

show examples

In other words

Linking Words

, shopping is not always

spending

Change preposition

about spending

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

money but

also

Linking Words

making

Change preposition

about making

show examples

people

Use synonyms

happy and feel

refresh

Wrong verb form

refreshed

show examples

. To illustrate,

buy

Wrong verb form

buying

show examples

something that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people

Use synonyms

really want

Verb problem

apply

show examples

can make them

relieve

Wrong verb form

relieved

show examples

from stress.

On the other hand

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

must bear in

their

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

mind

Correct word choice

that

show examples

shopping is not everything. They can make shopping more valuable.

For example

Linking Words

, the things that we shop

Change preposition

for is

show examples

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

not always our needs but just our impulsivity. Because of that,

people

Use synonyms

easily get bored by the things that have bought.

Thus

Linking Words

, they can donate or give it

for

Change preposition

show examples

those who more need it.

In other words

Linking Words

, shopping is not only an activity that

make

Change the verb form

makes

show examples

the shopper happy but

also

Linking Words

can be meaningful for others.

In addition

Linking Words

, the shopper can try other things

such

Linking Words

as going around because it is

also

Linking Words

can

make

Verb problem

give

show examples

them

get

Verb problem

apply

show examples

some fresh air and it

is have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

good impacts like shopping. To summarise, shopping is a shape of

appreciate

Change the verb form

appreciating

show examples

themselves. But, the shopping activity can be more useful if they want to share

Change preposition

with

show examples

others.

Moreover

Linking Words

, I highly recommend

who

Correct pronoun usage

those who

show examples

likes

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

shopping to do some other

activites

Correct your spelling

activities

like reading or doing sports.

wishmeluck Mon Jul 15 2024

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task achievement

Try to develop your arguments more fully by providing more detailed examples and explanations. This will help to demonstrate a thorough understanding of the topic.

coherence cohesion

Focus on ensuring that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that your supporting sentences consistently relate to this central point.

coherence cohesion

Work on enhancing the flow of your essay by using a variety of cohesive devices, such as transitional phrases and conjunctions, to link your ideas more smoothly.

task achievement

You've done a good job of introducing the topic and presenting a clear opinion on it.

coherence cohesion

Your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and offers a recommendation, which is a strong way to end the essay.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
34
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

279 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

pastime
encouraged
useful activities
self-expression
creativity
sense of accomplishment
satisfaction
social interaction
bonding
escaping
daily routine
stress
instant gratification
pleasure
keeping up
trends
fashion
exploring
products
experiences
boosting
self-confidence
supporting
local businesses
economy
discovering
personal style
preferences

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Shopping is the favorite pastime for most of the young people. Why do you think is that? Do you think they should be encouraged to do some other useful activities?

some people think that arts subjects such as Drama and Music are an important part of a school education. Others, however, think that they are a waste of time and resources. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

An increasing number of professional such as doctor and teacher are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. what problem does this cause and what are the solutions?