The illustration reveals the explanation of new features and layout changes in the library floor plan throughout a 20-year period.

The illustration reveals the explanation of new features and layout changes in the library floor plan throughout a 20-year period into
modern
Correct article usage
a modern
show examples
, common spot for dwellers with various interests First and foremost, the planners propose to remove the tables and chairs from the middle of the library.
This
will mean ballooning the amount of free space for the movement of customers.
Next,
the user needs were installed namely, information desk, cafe, and self-service machines.
Moreover
, the only unchanged adult fiction book area was relocated to the back side of the new lecture room.
In addition
to the measures above, the Public stack underwent significant digitalization, and a brand-new computer room was constructed for
this
purpose.
Furthermore
, the missions of every single audience were modified.
Consequently
, the public range was dilated
due to
the broadening of available material. In a nutshell, under these proposals, the needs of local residents will be better served by making Central Library a cosier and more pleasant environment.
Submitted by Umar on

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task achievement
Include a clearer introduction that explicitly states what changes occurred to the library over the 20-year period.
task achievement
Expand on the specific examples given, providing more detailed explanations or reasons for the changes. For instance, why were computers added? Why was space increased for movement?
coherence cohesion
Work on linking the paragraphs more smoothly. The transition between the first and second body paragraphs could be improved.
coherence cohesion
Use clearer and more varied connectors to enhance the flow of your essay. Currently, the transitions between ideas are somewhat abrupt.
task achievement
The essay provides a general overview of the changes that took place in the library floor plan over a 20-year period.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points discussed and provides a coherent ending to the essay.
task achievement
The main points are identified and the essay attempts to explain why certain changes were made.

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    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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    • Sentence 2 - Example
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  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
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