Some people believe that traveling is a valuable experience; others say it is a waste of time and money. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#some #people #waste #time #money

Although

some people believe that visiting other countries has a positive

effacts

Correct your spelling

effect

effects

on the soul and body others prefer saving money and time rather than spending them on

travel

However

this

essay will discuss the benefits of having a new experience from other countries in the

world

and how

travilling

Correct your spelling

travelling

changes the brain and the way people think by learning about other cultures.

Firstly

, one of the best ways to discover the

world

is by

travel

and gaining new experiences,going to another country like Egypt or India opens a new window in history,

for example

, Egypt has places built a thousand years ago by the slaves who built the pyramids of Giza,

also

there is the Islamic castles and mosques from the golden age of Islam.

Furthermore

besides

the historical

places

Add a comma

places,

show examples

visitors can have fun and relax at night parties which is very popular in Egypt.

However

, individuals should at least

travel

once in their lives to experience and see the past and present of the

world

and gain a wider vision for the future.

In addition

to the above points, folks can learn about other cultures and their tradition,

beside

Replace the word

besides

show examples

tasting different types of food like Asian dishes or Italian food.

Moreover

, people who

travel

a lot have an open mind which helps them to = understand

about

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

world

and build relationships easily.

For instance

, one of my friends every year goes to a different city in Europe which helps her to learn

English

Change the article

the English

show examples

language like a native and have a job in a global company. there are a lot of things can

gets

Change the verb form

get

show examples

from learning about other nation and their tradition which

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

worth spending money and time. In conclusion, I believe

traveling

Change the spelling

travelling

show examples

is the best method to enjoy and relax on holidays and discover the

world

, which allows the brain to see life in other aspects

Submitted by mariaalshrife on Mon Jul 15 2024

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task achievement

Your response to the task is generally complete, but there are some inaccuracies and room for improvement in clarity. Make sure to fully develop each point and support it with clear, specific examples.

task achievement

Try to keep your ideas clear and comprehensive. Ensure that each paragraph has a central topic and that all sentences in the paragraph relate to that topic.

coherence cohesion

Work on the logical structure of your essay. Each paragraph should connect smoothly to the next, and your ideas should flow logically from the introduction to the conclusion.

coherence cohesion

Support your main points with more specific examples and explanations to make your arguments stronger and more convincing.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has both an introduction and a conclusion, which gives it a clear structure.

task achievement

Your essay includes relevant examples to support your points.

coherence cohesion

Your conclusion effectively summarizes your opinion on the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

303 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that traveling is a valuable experience; others say it is a waste of time and money. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Your opinion

Being overweight has become a major health concern in many parts of the world. Explain the causes for being overweight and provide solutions.

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Some countries achieve international sports by building specialised facilities to train top athletes, instead of providing sports facilities that everyone can use. Do you think this is positive or negative development? Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Do you believe that self-driving cars will become common in the near future? Why or why not? Support your answer with reasons and expamles from your own knowledge or experience.

Smoking is a major cause of serious illness and death throughout the world today. In the interest of the public health, governments should ban cigarettes and other tobacco products. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that traveling is a valuable experience; others say it is a waste of time and money. Discuss both views and give your own opinion