IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 1

As a results of tourism and the increasing number of people travelling, there is an growing demand for more flights.what problems does this haveon the environment?what measures could be taken to slove the problem?

#results #tourism #people #demand #flights #haveon #environment #measures #slove
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As you know, tourism is a significant sector in many countries so, the demand
of
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for
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 flights
increacing
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increasing
 and
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the effect
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effect
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affects
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in
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on
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 the
enviroment
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environment
. In
this
 essay,
i
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I
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 will
disscus
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discuss
this
 issue and suggest some
solution
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solutions
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for
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to
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this
 problem.
firstly
, some
pople
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people
 are keen to travel and visit different places for
variouse
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various
reasones
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reasons
. some time they go
aboard
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abroad
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 to study,
works
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work
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 or even to
entertirment
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entertain
. so they use flights and that may damage the environment and cause
pollutio
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pollution
. To avoid
this
 problem or limit it we should less from
travle
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travel
. In
concluion
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conclusion
, tourism has
alot
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a lot
 of
benfities
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benefits
 but we should look
for
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apply
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backward
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backwards
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also
.
Submitted by almeem on

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task achievement
Ensure you address all parts of the task. Include both problems caused by increased flights and multiple measures that could be taken.
task achievement
Develop your main points clearly and provide supporting details or examples for each point.
coherence cohesion
Improve your logical structure by ensuring that each paragraph has a clear main idea and flows smoothly into the next.
coherence cohesion
Enhance cohesion by using a range of linking words/phrases to connect ideas and sentences more effectively.
coherence cohesion
Expand your introduction and conclusion to briefly summarize the main points you will discuss/have discussed.
task achievement
Your essay is focused on an important and relevant topic.
coherence cohesion
Both the introduction and the conclusion provide a clear framework for your discussion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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