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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows average carbon dioxide (CO2) emissions per person in the United Kingdom, Sweden, Italy, and Portugal between 1967 and 2007. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows average carbon dioxide (CO2) emissions per person in the United Kingdom, Sweden, Italy, and Portugal between 1967 and 2007. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#carbon #dioxide #co #emissions #person #kingdom #sweden #information #features #comparisons
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The line graph illustrates the average carbon dioxide
emissions
Use synonyms
 per person in four nations (
UK
Use synonyms
, Sweden, Italy, Portugal) which were produced over 40 years from 1967 to 2007.
Overall
Linking Words
, the CO2
emissions
Use synonyms
 in
Use synonyms
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 and Sweden went down,
while
Linking Words
 in Italy and Portugal, they went up.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 had the highest CO2
emissions
Use synonyms
 over the given period. With regards to the amount of
of
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
CO2
emissions
Use synonyms
 in the
UK
Use synonyms
, it began at around 11 metric
tonnes
Use synonyms
 and
then
Linking Words
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
dropped to 9 metric
tonnes
Use synonyms
 in 2007.
Similary
Correct your spelling
Similarly
, in Sweden, the figure started at 9 metric
tonnes
Use synonyms
 after which it peaked at 11 metric
tonnes
Use synonyms
 before falling rapidly
Change preposition
to
show examples
nearly 5
tonnes
Use synonyms
 in the final year.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, CO2
emissions
Use synonyms
 in Italy started to
rose
Wrong verb form
rise
show examples
, originally there were about 4 metric
tonnes
Use synonyms
 which reached just below 7 metric
tonnes
Use synonyms
 in 2007.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
Also,
show examples
 Portugal speedily hit the peak from roughly 1 to 5 metric
tonnes
Use synonyms
 in
final
Correct pronoun usage
its final
show examples
 years.
Submitted by s_syedy on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words emissions, uk, co, tonnes with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "went down" was used 2 times.
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