In recent years many local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centers to do their shopping. Is it a positive or negative development?

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Shopping in
department
stores
is more common today than going to traditional or local
stores
. There are some reasons why
people
like buying in large shopping centres.
However
, I believe that it will give some small business owners impact on their day-to-day operational activities.
People
think that buying something from local
shops
is boring because they cannot choose and pick what they want. Sometimes, traditional
shops
do not give the best services to shoppers, so they are distraught by
this
situation.
This
led to negative development in local
shops
,
for instance
, small business owners always think about how to increase their income, if the situation is still not conducive at all.
Additionally
, there are a lot of local
shops
that are closing because of the financial conditions.
Hence
, it creates unemployment and makes
people
lazy to do something creative.
On the other hand
, Shopping in
department
stores
may give shoppers easy access to buy. Sometimes, large
shops
give discounts and low prices to the public, so it attracts
people
to come.
Then
,
people
are more comfortable going to the mall because they have complete facilities
such
as clean toilets, a good food court, a comfort lounge and so on.
Besides
, some
department
stores
have an online infrastructure to make
people
easier to shop. In conclusion, local
shops
may suffer from
this
condition because shoppers tend to buy in large
shops
. Small business owners will close their
stores
because of financial aspects.
In contrast
, large
shops
and
department
stores
are going to the best choices for
people
to shop.
Submitted by irhamtaufiqurrahman on

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task achievement
Your essay provides a clear stance on the topic and addresses both positive and negative aspects. However, try to provide more specific examples to strengthen your points.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of your essay is generally clear, but some ideas could be better organized for clarity. For instance, consider linking the impact on small businesses more directly to the consumers' preference for large shopping centers.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-presented, giving a clear overview and summary of your thoughts.
task achievement
The essay covers the task completely, addressing both positive and negative sides of the development.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • economic decline
  • job losses
  • stimulate the economy
  • consumer convenience
  • under one roof
  • lower prices
  • erode local culture
  • unique character
  • carbon emissions
  • sustainable lifestyle
  • community hubs
  • social interactions
  • community spirit
  • local engagement
  • food courts
  • entertainment areas
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