IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The map below is of the town of Garlsdon. A new supermarket (S) is planned for the town. The map shows two possible sites for the supermarket.

The map below is of the town of Garlsdon. A new supermarket (S) is planned for the town. The map shows two possible sites for the supermarket.
#town #garlsdon #supermarket #two #sites
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The illustrated map shows the two possible sites in Garlsdon for a new supermarket with
population
Add an article
a population
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 of sixty-five
thousands
Change to singular
thousand
show examples
 people.
Overall
, it is evident that the future design is considering two distinct areas. The first site is located in
countryside
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the countryside
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while
 the second one opted for the town centre area without
traffic
Correct article usage
a traffic
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 zone. The first location
in
Add a missing verb
is in
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 the countryside in the northwest of the town centre.
This
 area
12
Add a missing verb
is 12
show examples
 km
far
Rephrase
away
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 from Branston and Hindon
place
Correct your spelling
the
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 population is ten
thousands
Change to singular
thousand
show examples
.
Nonetheless
,
this
 opted located between
railway
Correct article usage
the railway
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 and
main
Correct article usage
the main
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 road.
However
 Hindon
not
Add a missing verb
is not
show examples
 far from
industry
Correct article usage
the industry
show examples
 area. The second location showed the centre of Garlsdon city.The store is expected to stay in a traffic place with no traffic zone,
thus
 it cannot be accessible from
main
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the main
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 road.
However
,the railway will run across the option.
Therefore
, it
is still has
Change the verb form
still has
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 convenient access for the local communities.Cransdon
25
Add a missing verb
is 25
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km
far
Rephrase
away
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 from Hindon with
Correct article usage
a twenty
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twenty nine
Add a hyphen
twenty-nine
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thousands
Change to singular
thousand
show examples
 population.
Thus
,it will be accessible to everyone.
Submitted by shakhzod0905 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however, thus".
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Accessibility
  • Congestion
  • Economic benefits
  • Environmental impact
  • Foot traffic
  • Green space
  • Job creation
  • Local property values
  • Parking availability
  • Pollution
  • Proximity
  • Public transportation
  • Sustainability
  • Traffic patterns
  • Residential areas
  • Shopping convenience
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