In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Nowadays,
people
across the globe believe that it is beneficial to purchase their own
property
, rather than renting out for the rest of their
lives
.
This
case is majorly caused by the willingness to achieve
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
financial
stability
once they get older. I tend to believe that
this
is a sign of a positive development since those with
property
loans are likely to be encouraged
in maintaining
Change preposition
to maintain
show examples
their performances in
professional
Correct pronoun usage
their professional
show examples
lives
. First and foremost, the main cause of individuals choosing to own a
property
rather than renting is to secure their financial
stability
in the near
future
. If
people
keep renting a
house
and pay it monthly or yearly, they are likely to suffer from financial difficulties in the
future
, rather than owning one. Those who possessed their own
property
,
for example
, will only have a ten-year
mortage
Correct your spelling
mortgage
loan. So once the ten-year period loan is all settled, they will
finally
be free from liabilities related to
property
.
In contrast
, those who have never owned a
house
will have to pay for their
accomodations
Correct your spelling
accommodations
accommodation
fee
Fix the agreement mistake
fees
show examples
for the rest of their
lives
.
Consequently
, having
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
property
is essential for several
people
, especially those who want to secure their economic
stability
in the
future
.
Such
a phenomenon is a sign of a positive development.
People
who are motivated to buy a
house
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
likely to be encouraged to have
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
financial
stability
in order to pay for their mortgage as it
is usually comes
Change the verb form
usually comes
show examples
with a higher amount of
installment
Change the spelling
instalment
show examples
, rather than the amount of renting. Those kinds of population,
therefore
, will maintain their performance in their office, so they can have
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
career
stability
,
Correct word choice
and securing
show examples
securing
Wrong verb form
secure
show examples
their monthly salary which can be used to pay for their mortgage bills, either monthly or yearly. To illustrate, youngsters with a
ten-year-tenure
Correct your spelling
ten-year tenure
show examples
of
property
loan will strive to do their best to avoid lay-offs, which sometimes result in a better performance at work. If they keep up the good work until ten years later, they will achieve
such
a kind of financial
stability
with a
property
as their asset, and will not become a financial burden for their families or relatives during their retirement period. In conclusion, the main purpose of individuals aiming to possess a
house
is to secure their financial condition in the
future
years. I believe that
this
is a sign of a positive development as it brings
motivations
Fix the agreement mistake
motivation
show examples
and encouragement to several
people
in terms of securing their
lives
during their golden years.
Submitted by michellyonggo on

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coherence cohesion
While your essay is generally well-organized with clear main points, consider varying your sentence structures and using more diverse conjunctions to enhance the natural flow of your ideas.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. For example, using phrases like 'In addition' or 'Moreover' can help in enhancing coherence.
task achievement
You have provided a complete response to the task, but you can further strengthen your argument by offering more specific examples and data to back up your points.
task achievement
Try to address potential counterarguments to show a well-rounded perspective. This can add depth to your essay and demonstrate critical thinking.
task achievement
Your introduction clearly sets up the topic and your stance, making it easy for the reader to understand the direction of your essay.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear and logical structure that makes your essay easy to follow. Each paragraph has a clear main idea that supports your overall argument.
task achievement
The examples and reasoning you provided are relevant and help to illustrate your points effectively.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Homeownership
  • Property ladder
  • Real estate
  • Mortgage
  • Equity
  • Inflation hedge
  • Stability
  • Long-term investment
  • Asset
  • Liability
  • Housing market
  • Tenure
  • Down payment
  • Property taxes
  • Maintenance costs
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