In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping. Is this a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In
this
contemporary epoch, a certain proportion of people are shifting their purchases to the huge shopping centres rather than visiting to local traders of their area. In my opinion, there are various drawbacks to
this
scenario.
This
essay will delve into the advantages and disadvantages of
this
change and will lead to a logical conclusion as well.
To begin
with, the most prominent benefit of
this
change is that it helps individuals to change the
items
of various brands at different prices. As they get a variety of products,
this
assists them in purchasing the
items
under their budget line.
Moreover
, another reason could be convenience because any
items
can be chosen at shopping
malls
starting from groceries, clothes, medicines, shoes, and many more.
However
, local traders encourage the humans to get the
items
more conveniently as they are available in every town or village which helps to save time travelling to the city for shopping.
Moreover
, the local seller provides product warranties as well that give security to purchasers.
Although
the local trader never compromises the quality of their
items
whether they are clothes or food, still humans get allured by the beauty of
malls
According to
my viewpoint,
this
development is negative for society because the local traders are losing
this
importance in the market and are coping with the issues of financial crisis despite their excellent services.
Besides
,
malls
have become ubiquitous but there are numerous negative effects of
malls
on society, it has led to exacerbation of pollution,
they
Correct word choice
and they
show examples
have taken over land that could be used for residential purposes. Meanwhile, they are promoting foreign products
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
local ones.
To conclude
, as per the testimonials mentioned above it is crystal clear that more importance should be given to the local sellers only rather the choosing foreign brands because locals are more trustworthy and convenient.
Submitted by ss6802125 on

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task achievement
To improve your task response, make sure to provide more relevant and specific examples. For instance, mentioning specific local businesses that have closed down or highlighting particular advantages of local shops in greater detail could make your argument stronger.
task achievement
Your ideas are clear but could be more comprehensive. Consider expanding on each point to give a thorough explanation. This will help you achieve a higher score in task achievement.
coherence cohesion
Think about using a variety of cohesive devices to link your ideas more smoothly. Phrases like "on the other hand," "in contrast," and "moreover" can help to make your essay flow better.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction is well-structured and sets a clear expectation for the essay.
logical structure
The essay is logically structured with clear paragraphs that separate different points effectively.
supported main points
Your argument is generally well-supported with logical points that back up your main ideas.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • retail outlets
  • consumer behavior
  • shop locally
  • convenience
  • variety
  • economic growth
  • job creation
  • community
  • personal touch
  • small businesses
  • local economy
  • big corporations
  • dependence
  • shopping habits
  • urbanization
  • globalization
  • competition
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