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Some people believe that allowing children to make decisions on every day choices such as food, clothes, entertainment will result in a society of individuals who think only of themselves, others are of the opinion that decision should be made about issues which affect them. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #children #decisions #choices #food #clothes #entertainment #society #individuals #decision
These days,
parents
 who several methods for
growing
Verb problem
raising
show examples
children
;
moreover
, a group of the believe that when we let
children
 choose their devices; In fact, we grow
children
 who think only of themselves;
however
, other
people
 think it is crucial that decisions
made
Add a missing verb
are made
show examples
 about issues which affect them. In my opinion,
children
 must select
things
 that not only they want but
also
 they
needed
Wrong verb form
need
show examples
 by themselves
also
,
parents
 can help them in their matters. On the one hand, the first idea that child selects their
things
 makes them inhabitants who like everything for themselves have some advantages and demerits.These situations teach
children
 they are very important
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 their families, but their
parents
 have to display their work.
Nevertheless
, when young generations
designet
Correct your spelling
design
 tools, dishes, and pastimes that wanted without their
parents
' view,
then
 they cannot learn which
things
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
they choose
it's
Verb problem
are
show examples
 good for them;
as a result
, we can see some populations who do not obey the rules because they do not the negative and positive of their choice, which these kind of works are really dangerous for who societies are.
On the other hand
, when kids learn they have to share their issues with their
parents
, and they can help them to solve them,
then
 they say
thier
Correct your spelling
their
things
 that have a lot of influence in their lives ;
furthermore
, these facts have some benefits for these community.
Firstly
, if
children
 share their questions with families;
thereafter
, they can find solutions extremely fast.
Secondly
, they do not follow the crimes or bad road to change their position.
To sum up
, the best way that
can
Verb problem
apply
show examples
help younger
people
 to become
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
selective and not
people
 who like every piece of evidence for themselves is they have to make decisions that affect them with
people
 who have an experience.
Submitted by maryamkazemi968 on

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coherence cohesion
You should ensure that your paragraphs have a clear and logical structure. Each paragraph should have a main idea, supporting sentences, and a concluding sentence when needed. This will help convey your ideas more effectively.
task achievement
Try to be more precise and clear in expressing your ideas. Sometimes, your sentences are confusing and it's hard to understand what exactly you mean. Ensure that every sentence contributes to the argument you are making.
task achievement
Use specific examples to support your points. Providing concrete examples can make your argument more convincing and relatable.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction sets the context for the essay and highlights the two views that you will discuss.
introduction conclusion present
You attempt to conclude your essay and provide a summary of your argument in the final paragraph.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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