While some people believe that children need pressure from parents to develop, others disagree by agruing that parental pressure is unnecessary. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Nowadays,
Linking Words
overall
development of a child is essential and Correct article usage
the overall
required
lots of Wrong verb form
requires
efforts
. To achieve Fix the agreement mistake
effort
this
many Linking Words
parents
believe that they need to put Use synonyms
pressure
on their Use synonyms
children
, Use synonyms
However
, other people disagree and opine that it can be achieved without any Linking Words
pressure
as well. Use synonyms
This
essay will Linking Words
eleborate
Correct your spelling
elaborate
both
Change preposition
on both
the
views and provide my opinion as well.
On the one hand, Putting Correct article usage
apply
pressure
on Use synonyms
children
may provide the results but Use synonyms
this
method is highly risky. Sometimes It has been seen that people become too harsh on their kids for getting good marks in study Linking Words
but
resulting Correct word choice
apply
with
negativity and unexpected Change preposition
in
incident
. Though many Fix the agreement mistake
incidents
children
handle Use synonyms
this
Linking Words
pressure
to an extent Use synonyms
but
sometimes it has been seen that students kill Remove the conjunction
apply
themseleves
after not Correct your spelling
themselves
fullfilling
their Correct your spelling
fulfilling
Use synonyms
parents
expectations. Change to a genitive case
parent's
parents'
For example
, Linking Words
a recent news
from Punjab, where a student hanged Remove the article
recent news
a piece of recent news
himseleve
because he was not able to clear Correct your spelling
himself
IIT
Entrance exam. Correct article usage
the IIT
Thus
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
scenerio
may provide you Correct your spelling
scenario
the
results but it is a Add the preposition
with the
higly
risky technique.
Correct your spelling
highly
On the other hand
, Linking Words
children
can be grown well using motivation and guidance. Many Use synonyms
parents
Use synonyms
thesedays
, Correct your spelling
these days
Linking Words
following
Wrong verb form
follow
this
pattern Linking Words
and
Correct word choice
apply
guiding
Wrong verb form
guide
correct
way of living and Correct article usage
the correct
motivating
them Wrong verb form
motivate
with
the right direction. Change preposition
in
For instance
, Linking Words
a
recent data Correct article usage
apply
of
a school study shows that Change preposition
from
Use synonyms
parents
Change noun form
parents'
parent's
appriciation
Correct your spelling
appreciation
on
good Change preposition
of
habbits
and achievements helps Correct your spelling
habits
children
to grow better Use synonyms
therefore
schools now Linking Words
having
Wrong verb form
have
more
Correct article usage
a more
practicle
approach. Correct your spelling
practical
practice
Additionally
, confidence builds up when a child is appreciated and they understand the difference between right or wrong when Linking Words
guilded
properly and calmly.
Correct your spelling
guided
To conclude
, I would like to assert that, it is proven that when Linking Words
parents
Use synonyms
puts
excessive Change the verb form
put
pressure
Use synonyms
to
their Change preposition
on
children
resulting in horrible output, Use synonyms
however
Linking Words
In
my opinion, better results Add the comma(s)
, In
has
been seen when Change the verb form
have
children
Use synonyms
Add a missing verb
are guilded
guilded
and motivated in a proper manner.Correct your spelling
guided
Submitted by hiteshpaul on
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coherence cohesion
Try to use a wider range of vocabulary and avoid repetition of words and phrases. This will make your essay more engaging and demonstrate a broader command of English.
task achievement
Pay attention to grammar and spelling to reduce small errors that can take away from the clarity of your ideas. For instance, 'thesedays' should be 'these days', 'appreciation' should be 'appreciating', and 'appriciation' should be 'appreciation'.
task achievement
Try to provide a balanced discussion with a clear stance. In this essay, the arguments against pressuring children were more detailed compared to those in favor. Strive for a more even discussion and make your opinion explicit earlier in the essay.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction clearly outlines the topic and states that you will discuss both views and provide your opinion, which sets up the essay well.
task achievement
You provided relevant examples to support your points, such as the recent news from Punjab and the school study data. This helps in making your arguments more concrete.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and reiterates your opinion, which helps to bring closure to your essay.