Global warming is one of the most serious issues that the world is facing today. What are the causes of global warming and what measurements can governments and individuals take to tackle the issue?
Nowadays, the world is facing
phenomenon
of global warming which is one of the most serious problems. Add an article
the phenomenon
This
problem
can lead to other issues, such
as climate change. There are some reason
why global warming can happen. Obviously, the solutions for Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
this
issue also
available. I will discuss it below.
Add a missing verb
are also
The global
warming Correct article usage
Global
Wrong verb form
is
was causes
by Change the verb form
was caused
massiveness
of Add an article
the massiveness
using
Verb problem
apply
transportations
which need petrol or fuel. Everyday
a lot of vehicles are on the road and there is a gas that Replace the word
Every day
was
out from it. That kind of gasses can make an ozone layer more thin. When the layer Wrong verb form
is
got
thinner, not just global warming but Wrong verb form
gets
also
human
can Fix the agreement mistake
humans
experienced
skin cancer Change the verb form
experience
because
too much exposure Add the preposition
because of
from
the sun. Change preposition
to
For instance
, a factory who
Correct pronoun usage
that
emit
pollution can accelerate Correct subject-verb agreement
emits
the
global warming.
Correct article usage
apply
However
, there is an action that the government
and the citizens can do
to solve Verb problem
take
this
problem
. The government
must encourage more people to use public transportations
. To achieve Fix the agreement mistake
transportation
this
, firstly
, the government
have to make the access like busways or stations are
accessible for everyone. A common reason why people do not want to take mass Unnecessary verb
apply
transportations
is because they feel uncomfortable on it. To illustrate, in Indonesia, there is a sexual assault Fix the agreement mistake
transportation
problem
to
a woman by strangers on a train. Change preposition
of
Thus
, the government
have to focus on this
.
In conclusion, a high number of use private transportations
and the pollution from fabric are the main Fix the agreement mistake
transportation
problem
that causes global warming. To facing
Wrong verb form
face
this
, the government
should increase the safety and comfortness
Correct your spelling
comfort
on
public vehicles.Change preposition
of
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Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and stick to it. The essay tends to veer off-topic slightly, especially when discussing skin cancer and sexual assault. Stay focused on the main topic of global warming.
Coherence & Cohesion
Improve the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs. Use more cohesive devices such as 'furthermore,' 'moreover,' and 'therefore' to connect ideas.
Task Achievement
Work on providing more specific and relevant examples that directly relate to the causes of and solutions to global warming. The examples given should be more directly tied to the argument being made.
Task Achievement
Avoid generalizations and provide more in-depth explanations. For example, explain how factory emissions contribute to global warming more clearly.
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the main points asked in the question: causes and solutions of global warming.
Coherence & Cohesion
There is a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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