Global warming is one of the most serious issues that the world is facing today. What are the causes of global warming and what measurements can governments and individuals take to tackle the issue?

Nowadays, the world is facing
phenomenon
Add an article
the phenomenon
show examples
of global warming which is one of the most serious problems.
This
problem
can lead to other issues,
such
as climate change. There are some
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
show examples
why global warming can happen. Obviously, the solutions for
this
issue
also
Add a missing verb
are also
show examples
available. I will discuss it below.
The global
Correct article usage
Global
show examples
warming
Wrong verb form
is
show examples
was causes
Change the verb form
was caused
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by
massiveness
Add an article
the massiveness
show examples
of
using
Verb problem
apply
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transportations
which need petrol or fuel.
Everyday
Replace the word
Every day
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a lot of vehicles are on the road and there is a gas that
was
Wrong verb form
is
show examples
out from it. That kind of gasses can make an ozone layer more thin. When the layer
got
Wrong verb form
gets
show examples
thinner, not just global warming but
also
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
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can
experienced
Change the verb form
experience
show examples
skin cancer
because
Add the preposition
because of
show examples
too much exposure
from
Change preposition
to
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the sun.
For instance
, a factory
who
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
emit
Correct subject-verb agreement
emits
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pollution can accelerate
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
global warming.
However
, there is an action that the
government
and the citizens can
do
Verb problem
take
show examples
to solve
this
problem
. The
government
must encourage more people to use public
transportations
Fix the agreement mistake
transportation
show examples
. To achieve
this
,
firstly
, the
government
have to make the access like busways or stations
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
accessible for everyone. A common reason why people do not want to take mass
transportations
Fix the agreement mistake
transportation
show examples
is because they feel uncomfortable on it. To illustrate, in Indonesia, there is a sexual assault
problem
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
a woman by strangers on a train.
Thus
, the
government
have to focus on
this
. In conclusion, a high number of use private
transportations
Fix the agreement mistake
transportation
show examples
and the pollution from fabric are the main
problem
that causes global warming. To
facing
Wrong verb form
face
show examples
this
, the
government
should increase the safety and
comfortness
Correct your spelling
comfort
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
public vehicles.
Submitted by wishmeluck  on

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Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and stick to it. The essay tends to veer off-topic slightly, especially when discussing skin cancer and sexual assault. Stay focused on the main topic of global warming.
Coherence & Cohesion
Improve the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs. Use more cohesive devices such as 'furthermore,' 'moreover,' and 'therefore' to connect ideas.
Task Achievement
Work on providing more specific and relevant examples that directly relate to the causes of and solutions to global warming. The examples given should be more directly tied to the argument being made.
Task Achievement
Avoid generalizations and provide more in-depth explanations. For example, explain how factory emissions contribute to global warming more clearly.
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the main points asked in the question: causes and solutions of global warming.
Coherence & Cohesion
There is a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • greenhouse gas emissions
  • carbon footprint
  • renewable energy
  • carbon taxing
  • deforestation
  • industrial pollution
  • reforestation
  • conservation projects
  • public transportation
  • sustainable products
  • advocacy
  • raising public awareness
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