Some people think young people should be required to have full time education until they are at least 18 years old. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

There is an opinion that
children
from the age of 18 and below should be obligated to go to
school
.
This
is a notion I strongly align with as I believe that it makes society better and prevents
child
labor
Change the spelling
labour
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. The main reason why I think
education
should be made mandatory till the age of 18 is that It helps to improve the community. The classroom is a platform that allows teachers to
instill
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instil
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good character in students.
Moreover
, educational knowledge can help to reduce a country's crime rate because it provides information regarding the various negative implications of bad decisions.
For example
, in Nigeria, part of the
school
curriculum is Civil Science which teaches about the rules and obligations of the country,
hence
enlightening pupils about their duty to the betterment of society.
This
is a great method of enhancing society. Another justification for my agreement is that it reduces
child
labor
Change the spelling
labour
show examples
.
This
is because if all
children
are mandated to be at
school
, those who are not would be investigated.
Therefore
, authorities will have legal grounds to sue companies that exploit young ones from poor families.
Furthermore
, fostering
education
among young people today will make them become educated parents in the upcoming years. In the future, it would be easier for these parents to see reasons why
child
labor
Change the spelling
labour
show examples
is bad. To illustrate, in third-world countries where
education
is not compulsory,
children
of poor families become prey to industries that want cheap
labor
Change the spelling
labour
show examples
. Since the parents themselves did not go to
school
and
education
is not a written constitutional law
such
a wicked act is possible. In conclusion, I totally agree that full-time
education
should be made a necessary requirement for
children
who are aged 18 and below as I think it would make the community better and help to fight
child
labor
Change the spelling
labour
show examples
. In my opinion, the state should make
education
free so that all homes can benefit from it.
Submitted by favourade234 on

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coherence cohesion
While your arguments are clear and relevant, consider incorporating more varied sentence structures to demonstrate linguistic range and flexibility. This could help improve overall fluency and coherency.
task achievement
It would be beneficial to expand on your explanations and examples, providing more depth to support your points. For instance, adding statistics or additional real-world examples can make your arguments even more compelling.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear and logical structure, with a strong introduction and conclusion that effectively summarize and reinforce your main points.
task achievement
You have provided relevant examples to support your arguments, which helps to make your points more convincing.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • fundamental cornerstone
  • literacy and numeracy
  • social inequalities
  • foundation of knowledge
  • social mobility
  • informed and engaged citizenry
  • democratic processes
  • youth crime rates
  • productive activities
  • vocational training
  • workforce
  • stifling individual talent
  • economic contribution
  • stress and mental health issues
  • unsuitable educational system
  • one-size-fits-all approach
  • diverse talents
  • career paths
  • formal academic education
  • financial strains
  • low-income countries
  • improving quality of education
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