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Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? One should never judge a person by its external appearance. Use specific details and reasons to support your answer.

#judge #person #appearance #support
Many
people
 believe that
people
's shape and what they wear should not determine who they are. I agree with that, as we can not judge a book by its cover, and the same for us rather than focusing on
people
's appearance we should look at their mentality and their attitude toward others. First and foremost, the
way
 we think is more important than the
way
 we look. Many folks seem to be knowledgeable when they wear suits or how they are confident form themselves, but once we talk to them we will notice that they know nothing.
Furthermore
, if we focus on
people
's mentality rather than their skin colour or beauty, harmony between the community will increase and the world will develop in a better
way
.
Secondly
, our external appearance does not mean that we are good
people
, and we should not use it as a
way
 of judging others. Many good-looking
people
 turned out to be evil
people
,
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apply
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 and used their good looks to practice their bad attitudes.
In addition
, we should look at
people
's souls and their ways of dealing with others before judging them, so we do not lose them from our lives.
For example
, children in school may choose bad friends just because they are good-looking.
To sum up
,
people
 should not form their ideas about us from the outside, but they should see how we look from the inside
first,
and
this
 , in my opinion, will lead
healthy
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to healthy
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 communities and spread love between us .
Submitted by okalqusay on

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coherence cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, try to use more varied linking words and phrases to connect your ideas smoothly. This will help in presenting a more refined flow of information.
task achievement
Ensure that each paragraph contains a single main idea that is clearly supported by detailed evidence or examples. This will make your argument more compelling and easier to follow.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are both well-crafted, setting the stage for your argument and summarizing it effectively.
task achievement
You have addressed the prompt well and provided logical reasons and examples to support your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • misleading
  • assumptions
  • competent
  • skilled
  • character
  • values
  • indicators
  • kindness
  • integrity
  • intelligence
  • critical aspects
  • cultural misunderstandings
  • biases
  • circumstances
  • health issues
  • economic conditions
  • personal emergencies
  • fair
  • just
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