The bar chart shows the top ten countries for production and consumption of electricity in 2014

The bar chart shows the top ten countries for production and consumption of electricity in 2014
The bar chart provides information
how
Change preposition
on how
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electricity
is manufactured and utilized in peak ten states in 2014. As an
overall
trend, China has major utilization and production of
electricity
,
while
a country that has the least
manufactured
Replace the word
manufacturing
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and exploitation of electric
power
is the Republic of Korea . In terms of energy construction, China is the top-ranked country with 5,398
billion
KWh
Fix capitalization
kWh
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of energy production. US , Russia and Japan in 2014 produced 4099 , 1057 and 936.3
billion
kWh
of
electricity
.The fifth-ranked country is India with 871
billion
KWh
production and Canada is sixth-ranked which manufactured 618.9 tons
kWh
of
power
.
Furthermore
, France , Brazil and Germany produced 561.2 , 530.7 and 526.6
kWh
of
power
respectively.
Finally
, the Republic of Korea made 485.1 lots
kWh
Change preposition
of kWh
show examples
of
electricity
.
Conversely
,China ,America and Russia consumed 5322 , 3866 and 1038
KWh
of
power
. Japan is in 4th position with the use of 936.2
billion
kWh
power
Change preposition
of power
show examples
.
Additionally
,India , Canada , France and Brazil used 698.8 , 499.9 , 462.9 and 455.8
billion
kWh
of
electricity
.
Finally
, Germany and Korea utilized 582.5 and 449.5
billion
kWh
of
power
respectively in 2014.
Submitted by mianraza686 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "finally".
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words electricity, power, billion, kwh with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • megawatt-hours (MWh)
  • electricity grid
  • renewable energy sources
  • fossil fuels
  • energy efficiency
  • consumption patterns
  • power generation
  • industrial demand
  • residential use
  • transmission losses
  • energy imports
  • sustainability
  • carbon footprint
  • energy policy
  • capacity
  • infrastructure
  • demand and supply
  • electrification
  • energy security
  • grid reliability
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