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Writing Samples
Band 5

The map and chart below show the information for the global willingness to eat insect products and the current price for certain food available on the market place.

The map and chart below show the information for the global willingness to eat insect products and the current price for certain food available on the market place.
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The following map and chart
represents
Correct subject-verb agreement
represent
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
information about the global willingness to eat insect
products
Use synonyms
 and the prices of various
food
Fix the agreement mistake
foods
show examples
 available on the recent
market place
Correct your spelling
marketplace
show examples
, indicated in percentage and US
Dollar
Fix the agreement mistake
Dollars
show examples
 per kilogram, respectively.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be clearly observed that developed countries seem to have fewer
pecentages
Correct your spelling
percentages
percentage
 of the will
in eating
Change preposition
to eat
show examples
 insects,
whereas
Linking Words
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
those developing countries noticeably have higher figures.
However
Linking Words
, it is
intertestingly
Correct your spelling
interesting
interestingly
 to note that China and Africa
having
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
a reverse results
Correct the article-noun agreement
reverse results
a reverse result
show examples
unlike
Add the comma(s)
, unlike
show examples
 the others.
Moreover
Linking Words
, it
can
Verb problem
apply
show examples
is obvious
to see
Verb problem
apply
show examples
that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
wildlife
products
Use synonyms
 gain
larger
Correct article usage
a larger
show examples
 sum per unit,
while
Linking Words
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
those basic meats and
products
Use synonyms
 are cheaper.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, the research found that at 71%, Mexicans
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 the highest percentage of willingness to eat insect
products
Use synonyms
 among all other developing nations, followed by, Peruvians,
Thais
Correct word choice
and Thais
show examples
, at 58% and 56%,respectively.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the number of
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
agree
Correct pronoun usage
who agree
show examples
 to try insect
products
Use synonyms
 from developed countries
such
Linking Words
 as the States, the United Kingdom, Spain, Russia,
Australia
Correct word choice
and Australia
show examples
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 less than 40%, except China and Japan, at 44% and 21% only. In regards to the food prices, basic meats and ingredients that
consumed
Add a missing verb
are consumed
show examples
 universally
such
Linking Words
 as red meats,
pultry
Correct your spelling
poultry
 and
rices
Change the wording
rice
kinds of rice
packets of rice
grains of rice
show examples
 are
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
lower
Add an article
a lower
show examples
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
 than those wild
products
Use synonyms
 of no more than 3.5
USD
Use synonyms
/
kg
Use synonyms
.
Beef
Add an article
The beef
show examples
 was the only
Use synonyms
products
Fix the agreement mistake
product
show examples
 that reached its
peaked
Change the form of the verb
peak
show examples
 among other
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
 in
this
Linking Words
 group at 3.03
USD
Use synonyms
/
kg
Use synonyms
,
whereas
Linking Words
 Thai Hom Mali rice
only
Add a missing verb
was only
show examples
 price
Change preposition
at 0.78USD
show examples
0.78USD
Correct your spelling
0.78 USD
/
kg
Use synonyms
.
Comparing
Wrong verb form
Compared
show examples
 with the wild
products
Use synonyms
,
Weaver
Correct article usage
the Weaver
show examples
 ant was the most expensive among all wild
products
Use synonyms
 at 10.65
USD
Use synonyms
/
kg
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
female
Correct article usage
the female
show examples
 Giant water bug
only
Add a missing verb
was only
show examples
 worth
one fifth
Add a hyphen
one-fifth
show examples
 of the Weaver ants.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "such, whereas, while".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words products, usd, kg with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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