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Writing Samples
Band 4

The following table shows the number of people from five European nations living in each other’s countries in 2011. You should write at least 150 words.

The following table shows the number of people from five European nations living in each other’s countries in 2011. You should write at least 150 words.
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The table demonstrates the migration rate of five European nations residing in each other’s countries in 2011.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 the Germans had the highest migration ratio
while
Linking Words
 the Polishs had the lowest in 2011. Starting with Germany and England, these two countries had the highest
number
Use synonyms
 of individuals living in another nation, recording a large
number
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 of above 1 million. The majority of British
emigrants
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 live in Poland 550,000 people
while
Linking Words
 the largest
number
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 of German
emigrants
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resided
Wrong verb form
reside
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 in Italy 556,000 people. Turning to Italy and Spain, more Spanish citizens dwelled in other countries as compared with Italians.
such
Linking Words
 that the Italy
emigrants
Use synonyms
 were almost times four of Spain's with a record of 196000 individuals and 861000 individuals respectively. In regards to Polish emigration, across all five nations, they recorded the lowest
number
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 of just 6000
emigrants
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 with its largest proportion being 4,400 residents in Spain.
Submitted by favourade234 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, emigrants with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.
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