Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Now days
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Nowadays
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as a sort of help to poor
countries
, some wealthy
countries
provide money to them, so some people think that
fianancial
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financial
support can provide
better
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a better
show examples
quality of life ,
while
other
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others
show examples
blieve
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believe
that giving them another type of resource will enable them to grow ,
this
essay will
dicuss
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discuss
both sides and will draw my personal conclusion.
In
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On
show examples
one hand, people know the
resources
and goods of their country and
only
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the only
show examples
thing they need to start growing is money,
for
example
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example,
show examples
papulations of Yemen, has
great
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a great
show examples
natural area which can be used to build resorts, spas or parks ,but
its
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it's
it is
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not possible
due to
funding issue, so that's why some think that money can improve population life if they know how to use it.
On the other hand
,supplying poor
countries
with
resources
depend
Wrong verb form
depending
show examples
on their areas and
climet
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climate
, will enable them to have their own income , to illustrate , providing cotton plant seeds and harvesting
resources
to some
of
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apply
show examples
African
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the African
show examples
countries
as
well
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will
show examples
, teach them
basics
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the basics
show examples
of planting , will increase cotton
prodction
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production
,
then
by exporting or saling it they will have profits .
Hene
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Hence
show examples
,
the
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they
show examples
blieve
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believe
that ,helping with providing needs and
resources
better
Add a missing verb
is better
show examples
than financial aid, which
consider
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considers
show examples
as
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apply
show examples
passive help. In conclusion , after
carefull
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careful
analysis of both
point
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points
show examples
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of views
show examples
views
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view
show examples
. I
Correct your spelling
believe
blieve
Correct your spelling
believe
that, helping other
countries
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by
show examples
with
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by
show examples
giving them supplies of raw materials and
resources
they need , will allow them to be dependent on their own income, solve their
Correct your spelling
problems
peroblems
Correct your spelling
problems
and eliminate
Correct your spelling
poverty
poverity
Correct your spelling
poverty
.
Submitted by meajaberi on

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coherence cohesion
It's important to ensure that each paragraph flows logically from one to the next. Use transitional phrases like 'furthermore,' 'moreover,' and 'in addition' to link ideas more effectively.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples and details to support your points. For instance, consider including data or real-world examples where financial aid failed or succeeded.
coherence cohesion
Improve the introduction by clearly stating your position. This will make your essay more cohesive and easier for the reader to follow your argument.
task achievement
Avoid repetition of ideas. Focus on making each point distinct and elaborately discussed.
coherence cohesion
Double-check your spelling, syntax, and grammar to improve the overall readability of your essay.
task achievement
The essay covers both sides of the argument effectively, offering a balanced view.
coherence cohesion
The structure of the essay, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, is fundamentally sound.
task achievement
You have presented a clear conclusion that aligns with the points discussed in the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • poverty alleviation
  • economic inequality
  • developing nations
  • foreign aid
  • sustainable growth
  • technical assistance
  • expertise
  • infrastructure
  • education
  • fair trade
  • trade barriers
  • sustainable development
  • environmental conservation
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