Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Now days
as a sort of help to poor Correct the word
Nowadays
countries
, some wealthy countries
provide money to them, so some people think that fianancial
support can provide Correct your spelling
financial
better
quality of life , Add an article
a better
while
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
blieve
that giving them another type of resource will enable them to grow , Correct your spelling
believe
this
essay will dicuss
both sides and will draw my personal conclusion.
Correct your spelling
discuss
In
one hand, people know the Change preposition
On
resources
and goods of their country and only
thing they need to start growing is money, Add an article
the only
for
example
papulations of Yemen, has Add a comma
example,
great
natural area which can be used to build resorts, spas or parks ,but Add an article
a great
its
not possible Replace the word
it's
it is
due to
funding issue, so that's why some think that money can improve population life if they know how to use it.
On the other hand
,supplying poor countries
with resources
depend
on their areas and Wrong verb form
depending
climet
, will enable them to have their own income , to illustrate , providing cotton plant seeds and harvesting Correct your spelling
climate
resources
to some of
Change preposition
apply
African
Add an article
the African
countries
as well
, teach them Correct your spelling
will
basics
of planting , will increase cotton Correct article usage
the basics
prodction
, Correct your spelling
production
then
by exporting or saling it they will have profits . Hene
, Correct your spelling
Hence
the
Correct your spelling
they
blieve
that ,helping with providing needs and Correct your spelling
believe
resources
better
than financial aid, which Add a missing verb
is better
consider
Change the verb form
considers
as
passive help.
In conclusion , after Change preposition
apply
carefull
analysis of both Correct your spelling
careful
point
Fix the agreement mistake
points
Change preposition
of views
views
. I Fix the agreement mistake
view
Correct your spelling
believe
blieve
that, helping other Correct your spelling
believe
countries
Change preposition
by
with
giving them supplies of raw materials and Change preposition
by
resources
they need , will allow them to be dependent on their own income, solve their Correct your spelling
problems
peroblems
and eliminate Correct your spelling
problems
Correct your spelling
poverty
poverity
.Correct your spelling
poverty
Submitted by meajaberi on
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coherence cohesion
It's important to ensure that each paragraph flows logically from one to the next. Use transitional phrases like 'furthermore,' 'moreover,' and 'in addition' to link ideas more effectively.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples and details to support your points. For instance, consider including data or real-world examples where financial aid failed or succeeded.
coherence cohesion
Improve the introduction by clearly stating your position. This will make your essay more cohesive and easier for the reader to follow your argument.
task achievement
Avoid repetition of ideas. Focus on making each point distinct and elaborately discussed.
coherence cohesion
Double-check your spelling, syntax, and grammar to improve the overall readability of your essay.
task achievement
The essay covers both sides of the argument effectively, offering a balanced view.
coherence cohesion
The structure of the essay, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, is fundamentally sound.
task achievement
You have presented a clear conclusion that aligns with the points discussed in the essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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