Nowadays, many people have to work long time, and they feel more stressful than before. What are the reasons? What employers can do to make their life easier?

At
this
time a lot of people need to work longer and that makes them feel more stressed than in the past, and the reason is to provide a better life. In
this
period the ways to have a good life changed and became more difficult, so employers had to work longer and harder in any type of work,
due to
the high cost of living and the low salaries as well.
Submitted by ahmedaziz9811 on

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task achievement
Ensure your essay answers both questions fully. Explain the reasons why people work long hours in detail and clearly outline what employers can do to mitigate these stresses.
coherence cohesion
Organize your essay with clear paragraphs that follow a systematic structure (introduction, body paragraphs, conclusion). This will greatly improve readability and logical flow.
task achievement
Include more examples and specifics to strengthen your argument. For instance, discussing specific industries or changes in work culture could add depth to your points.
task achievement
You've correctly identified an important issue – the increase in working hours and stress. This is a relevant and contemporary topic to discuss.
coherence cohesion
Your sentences are grammatically correct and the language used is appropriate for the topic. This shows a good command of basic English language skills.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • comfortable lifestyle
  • make ends meet
  • culture of 'presenteeism'
  • job insecurity
  • technological advancements
  • constant connectivity
  • globalization
  • irregular work hours
  • flexible working schedules
  • work-life balance
  • employee training and development
  • productivity
  • efficiency
  • healthier work environment
  • mental health resources
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