IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

The graph illustrates how crime rates altered in Panama City during the period 2010-2019. We can see immediately that the greatest change occurred in the number of burglaries, while incidents of theft remained low but steady.

The graph illustrates how crime rates altered in Panama City during the period 2010-2019. We can see immediately that the greatest change occurred in the number of burglaries, while incidents of theft remained low but steady.
#crime #rates #panama #city #period #change #burglaries #incidents #theft
The given bar chart depicts the transmute rates of crimes in
panama
Change the capitalization
Panama
show examples
 city in three different
situation
Change to a plural noun
situations
show examples
 in the
year
 starting from 2010 to 2019.
overall
, we can see the
grow
Replace the word
growth
show examples
 in burglary starting in 2010 after that it climbed slowly .Moving
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
car theft it kept
quit
Correct your spelling
quiet
show examples
 the same between the
year
 2010 to the end of 2012
as well as
, started to be
unastable
Correct your spelling
unstable
 the
folowing
Correct your spelling
following
year
 .
However
,
robery
Correct your spelling
robbery
Robert
 stayed the same throughout the years .
Moreover
 , the highest rate
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 burglary was in 2011
then
 it started to decrease until it
sudenly droped
Correct your spelling
suddenly dropped
.In
adittion
Correct your spelling
addition
 car theft has stayed the same
the
Change preposition
for the
show examples
 past three years after that we can see
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 fall in 2013.
furthermore
, car theft climbed up again in 2017 .
Finally
,robbery
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
leveled
Change the spelling
levelled
show examples
 off
thoughout
Correct your spelling
throughout
 the years until the
year
 2017 the rate of
roberry
Correct your spelling
robbery
berry
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased.
Submitted by aljouri50x50 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words year with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "climbed" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "stayed" was used 2 times.
▼

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!