Task 1 the charts below give information on the location and types of dance classes young people in a town in Australia are currently attrnding

#information #location #dance #classes #people #town #australia

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The pie chart and the bar chart show the information about the

dance

Use synonyms

classes in Australia

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the location and the types of

dance

Use synonyms

. First of all, there are many places

Change preposition

for

show examples

the

dance

Use synonyms

classes.

The most

Correct article usage

Most

show examples

place

people

Use synonyms

in Australia go to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

private studios

Change preposition

apply

show examples

48 per cent.

Moreover

Linking Words

, the community halls and school halls

people

Use synonyms

go to there almost 18 per cent and 24 per cent, respectively.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, the

last

Linking Words

location

people

Use synonyms

go to there is college-based studios.

However

Linking Words

, the type of the

dance

Use synonyms

and the age.

First,

Linking Words

ballet

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

the most

dance

Use synonyms

students under 11 love it

Change preposition

apply

show examples

600

person

Change to a plural noun

people

show examples

Second,

Linking Words

the

moder

Correct your spelling

modern

dances

people

Use synonyms

who

between

Add a missing verb

are between

show examples

11 and 16 prefer it.

Last

Linking Words

but not least, tap

dance

Use synonyms

students who

under

Add a missing verb

are under

show examples

11 to 16 almost like it, about 430 students.

Overall

Linking Words

, we could say that private studios

Change the verb form

are

show examples

the best in comparison with other places.

Submitted by joudaalhammadi on Sat Jul 20 2024

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words dance, people with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.

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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

149 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

distribution
attendance
community centers
dance schools
private studios
ballet
hip-hop
contemporary
ballroom
analysis
popularity
accessibility
cost
cultural trends
media influences

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Task 1 the charts below give information on the location and types of dance classes young people in a town in Australia are currently attrnding

Some people think that university education should be free, while others believe students should pay for it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Young people prefer listening to music rather than listening to the news on the radio. Is this a positive or a negative trend? Provide reasons and examples for your opinion.

Some students prefer classes with frequent discussions between the professor and the students with almost no lectures. Other students prefer classes with many lectures and almost no discussions. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

There is no doubt that globalisation has benefited the world by bringing together people, business and nations. People who criticise it stand in the way of progress. To what extent do you agree or disagree?