More and more people in the city live in homes with small spaces or no outdoor areas. Do you think it is a negative or positive development?

#people #city #homes #spaces #areas #development

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It is widely speculated that in the contemporary era,

majority

Correct article usage

the majority

show examples

of the facilities and services are condensed in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

large cities.Simultaneously,

rapid

Correct article usage

a rapid

show examples

influx of people to settle in

such

Linking Words

areas is inevitable.It is conspicuous that

this

Linking Words

increase of urbanization has

catalysted

Correct your spelling

catalysed

catalyzed

the scarcity of living spaces ,

thus

Linking Words

, citizens are used to

live

Change the verb form

living

show examples

in smaller

houses

Use synonyms

without gardens.

Although

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

issue has both positive and negative impacts I believe that drawbacks will outweigh the merits.My stance on it will be expounded

Change preposition

show examples

the following Essay with

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

compelling reasons and

relavant

Correct your spelling

relevant

examples. Recently, people are leading a hectic time schedule

hence

Linking Words

most of them

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

seem to be pressed by unstable mentalities.Usually, a home plays a

pivota

Correct your spelling

pivotal

role in their life as a relaxing methodology.

Therefore

Linking Words

, spaced

houses

Use synonyms

with nicely arranged home gardens will assist them

to mitigate

Change preposition

in mitigating

show examples

their stresses.

Conversely

Linking Words

, the

low spaced

Add a hyphen

low-spaced

show examples

houses

Use synonyms

with a tight setup will create

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

complex

surrounding

Fix the agreement mistake

surroundings

show examples

, which will induce

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

anxiousness and

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

stress.

Similarly

Linking Words

, lack of privacy is

also

Linking Words

a crucial issue related to small

houses

Use synonyms

. Admittedly, as plenty

Use synonyms

houses

Change preposition

of houses

show examples

are constructed in a small

space

Use synonyms

, many social conflicts

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

evolved.

For example

Linking Words

, statistics reveal that social issues are gigantically higher in slum areas when compared with areas with large

houses

Use synonyms

On the other hand

Linking Words

, living in a smaller house has a myriad importance in many aspects. Usually, as those residents have a lower

space

Use synonyms

, their requirements are so much

simple

Correct word choice

simpler

show examples

Thus

Linking Words

,money expenditure on unnecessary home appliances will be reduced. In the same way , sharing the

space

Use synonyms

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

still

enhance

Correct subject-verb agreement

enhances

show examples

the familial relationships and bonds within the families eventually

this

Linking Words

will

affect

Wrong verb form

be affected

show examples

in a positive way.

Finally

Linking Words

, when considering the developmental strategies, it is found that the living status

as well as

Linking Words

the social behaviors are key determinants of it. So, the people should be facilitated with ample

space

Use synonyms

residences with the outdoor facilities

For instance

Linking Words

, it is commonly seen that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

most of the highly demanded apartments are now included with perfect arrays of Indoor and outdoor

rrrangements

Correct your spelling

arrangements

To conclude

Linking Words

, despite the fact that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

smaller

houses

Use synonyms

require a lower level of expenses and they help to

strong

Replace the word

strengthen

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

family bonds,

due to

Linking Words

the social impact and

also

Linking Words

the mental stability ,which have

strong

Add an article

a strong

show examples

influence on development, I assert that smaller

houses

Use synonyms

will affect negatively on the level of mental process.

Submitted by oriexam6 on Sun Jul 21 2024

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coherence cohesion

Improve the clarity and coherence by structuring the ideas logically. Ensure that each paragraph flows smoothly to the next, making it easier for the reader to follow your argument.

coherence cohesion

Try to avoid complex and convoluted sentences, which may confuse the reader. Simple and clear sentences often convey ideas more effectively.

task achievement

Provide more specific examples to support your arguments. This will help to illustrate your points more vividly and strengthen your overall response.

task achievement

Expand on the reasons for your viewpoint in a more detailed manner, so your stance becomes even clearer to the reader.

introduction conclusion

Your introduction clearly states the topic and your stance on it, which sets a clear direction for the essay.

introduction conclusion

The conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and reinforces your stance, providing a satisfying end to the essay.

task achievement

You have provided a balanced view by considering both the positive and negative aspects of the issue.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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16
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
28
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

391 words

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More and more people in the city live in homes with small spaces or no outdoor areas. Do you think it is a negative or positive development?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

With the improvements in today’s health care, society has to care for more and more elderly people. Do you feel that society will be able to cope with the increase in numbers of elderly people today and how can it be managed?

In many countries, more and more people choose to buy imported food rather than food produced locally. Why people buy imported food? What could be done to encourage people to buy local food?

more and more students are choosing to study at colleges and universities in foreign country. do the benefits of studying abroad outweigh the drawbacks?

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. what are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?