Some people claim that it is acceptable to use animals in medical research for the benefit of human beings, while other people argue that it is wrong. Discuss both views and give your opinion
A group of individuals present the view that it is natural to use
animals
for scientific research
for the
human lives, Correct article usage
apply
whereas
others believe it is not acceptable.
On the one hand, some people justifiably argue that it is necessary to do medical tests on new drugs. Animal testing can help to advance medical and scientific knowledge. In a comprehensive study, research
findings at North Carolina State University from 2000 to 2010 confirm that many important medical discoveries involved experimentation on animals
. medical research
using animals
has led to numerous medical breakthroughs, such
as vaccines and treatments for various diseases, which have significantly improved human health. In addition
, researchers aim to minimise the suffering that animals
experience. A case in point is, testing
for the cosmetics industry is now banned in many countries.
Correct word choice
that testing
On the other hand
, another group of people claim that the lives of animals
should be respected. They insist that humans have no moral right to do experiments on animals
. They use zoos as an example and argue that zoo animals
are kept in artificial environments. Since they are kept in cages or have limited space, they lose their freedom to hunt for food. Besides
, animals
frequently suffer extreme pain due to
biological and physical experiments or vaccine testing to curb some previously injected into their body. However
, I do not find this
argument convincing as zoos allow scientists to study animals
and their behaviour. For instance
, animal testing has led to many discoveris
Correct your spelling
discoveries
such
as Corona Virus vaccine.
To conclude
, in my view, animal testing for advance
medical and scientific knowledge is necessary. medical Replace the word
advanced
research
using animals
has led to numerous medical breakthroughs. Moreover
, animal testing has resulted in to
many Replace the word
too
discoveris
Correct your spelling
discoveries
such
as Corona Virus vaccine.Submitted by shady_ee on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that paragraphs follow a logical sequence, with each supporting point clearly linking back to the central argument.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repetitive phrases in the conclusion; present your main points concisely and in a fresh way.
coherence cohesion
Make sure your introduction and conclusion are strong. Your conclusion should not repeat points verbatim from the body paragraphs but rather summarize and reinforce them.
task achievement
Support each point with more specific examples and elaboration to add depth to your arguments.
task achievement
Expand upon key points to ensure a comprehensive response to all aspects of the task question.
task achievement
Ensure that all main ideas are stated clearly and are fully developed to avoid any ambiguity.
task achievement
Your essay addresses both views well and provides a clear opinion.
task achievement
Good use of relevant examples, like the significant findings at North Carolina State University and the Corona Virus vaccine.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
coherence cohesion
You present balanced arguments for both sides, which adds depth to your discussion.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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