You live in a room in college which you share with another student. However, there are many problems with this arrangement and you find it very difficult to work. Write a letter to the accommodation officer at the college. In the letter, • describe the situation • explain your problems and why it is difficult to work • say what kind of accommodation you would prefer

Dear Sir, I am writing

this

Linking Words

letter with regard to

inform

Wrong verb form

informing

show examples

you about the accommodation issues in the college

room

Use synonyms

To begin

Linking Words

with, the

room

Use synonyms

Change the article

apply

show examples

quite small for the two members and our

room

Use synonyms

has only one bed in comparison with other bedrooms in the college.

Moreover

Linking Words

,the

room

Use synonyms

is not only untidy but

also

Linking Words

previous students left

their

Change the pronoun

them

show examples

some

stuffs

Change the wording

stuff

kinds of stuff

pieces of stuff

show examples

,which has taken more space in the use.

In addition

Linking Words

,it is difficult for me to manage some problems.

Firstly

Linking Words

, there is very limited space to accommodate my household stuff,

therefore

Linking Words

putted

Correct your spelling

put

show examples

those in my friend's

room

Use synonyms

Secondly

Linking Words

, the fan in the

room

Use synonyms

is not working properly,

Linking Words

due

Correct word choice

and due

show examples

this

Linking Words

,it is challenging for me to work on my study.

Lastly

Linking Words

, I would like to share my opinion in terms of living space. In that, I am not excepting private

room

Use synonyms

but the bedrooms should be comfortable enough for two members.

Apart from

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

,the basic amenities should be provided without any problem. I hope you will address these concerns as soon as possible. yours sincerely, Parthkumar

pp6859

Jul 21, 2024

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task achievement

Try to elaborate a bit more on how the issues specifically impact your ability to study, providing more detailed examples or scenarios.

coherence cohesion

Some sentences could be split or joined for better flow. For instance, 'Moreover, the room is not only untidy but also previous students left their some stuffs' can be clearer as two separate sentences.

task achievement

You have clearly described the situation, listed specific problems, and provided a solution which addresses your concerns.

coherence cohesion

Your letter includes a proper greeting and closing, which adds formality and completeness.

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

8 paragraphs

172 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

accommodation officer
roommate
share a room
living arrangement
difficult to work
noise levels
study environment
privacy concerns
alternative accommodation
single room
academic performance
well-being
respectfully request

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