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Band 6.5

The line graph shows the cost for watching films. The pie charts show the shift in the percentage of market share among the three types.

The line graph shows the cost for watching films. The pie charts show the shift in the percentage of market share among the three types.
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The given two graphs show the cost of watching films among three types: cinema tickets, DVDs, and legal downloads between 2005 and 2011.
Overall
Linking Words
, there was a huge increase in the legal download sector from
one twentieth
Add a hyphen
one-twentieth
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 to 56% in 6 years. In 2005, renting DVDs consisted of almost 60%,
however
Linking Words
 ,
this
Linking Words
 amount declined to nearly a quarter by 2011. The cost of cinema tickets changed from nearly
one third
Add a hyphen
one-third
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 to approximately
one fifth
Add a hyphen
one-fifth
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 over these six years. Compared to the renting DVD segment, the percentage for going to the cinema decreased slightly—by only 18%.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, renting DVDs dropped from 59% to around a quarter.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
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