IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Government of many countries had to impose a lockdown to control the Coronavirus pandemic. What were the advantages and disadvantages of this lockdown.Give eamples from your own experience

#government #countries #lockdown #control #coronavirus #pandemic #eamples
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Use synonyms
Government
Fix the agreement mistake
Governments
show examples
 in many states had to implement a
lockdown
Use synonyms
 to handle the Covid-19 pandemic.
This
Linking Words
 policy
was happen
Change the verb form
happened
show examples
 because the
spreadness
Correct your spelling
spread
 of Corona was fast around the world. Of course, there are some benefits of
this
Linking Words
such
Linking Words
 as the
government
Use synonyms
 can protect the citizen and the medical personnel.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the
people
Use synonyms
 can not gather with their family and friends. First of all, by
impose
Change the verb form
imposing
show examples
Use synonyms
lockdown
Correct article usage
a lockdown
show examples
, the
government
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 can track the activity of their citizens.
Lockdown
Use synonyms
help
Change the verb form
helps
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 to stay healthy. Not only that, but
also
Linking Words
 the
government
Use synonyms
 has a chance to control the escalation of
total
Correct article usage
the total
show examples
 amount Covid-19's patients.
Because if
Correct word choice
If
show examples
 there is no
lockdown
Use synonyms
, the kind of
people
Use synonyms
 who will get the
worse
Correct word choice
worst
show examples
experienced
Replace the word
experience
show examples
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 the doctors.
For example
Linking Words
, enforcing
Use synonyms
lockdown
Fix the agreement mistake
lockdowns
show examples
 will keep
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
 from viruses and the patients of
Covid-19
Change preposition
with Covid-19
show examples
 will not increase. So,
lockdown
Use synonyms
 is giving advantages
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the
government
Use synonyms
, the
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
, and the doctors. On the other sides, can not be denied that
lockdown
Use synonyms
 make
people
Use synonyms
 far from social
gathering
Fix the agreement mistake
gatherings
show examples
. They can not
held
Change the verb form
hold
show examples
 an event with their loved ones
due to
Linking Words
 social distancing as a part of
lockdown
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
lockdown
Use synonyms
 can make
people
Use synonyms
 feel
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
sad and easily get bored
owing to
Verb problem
because
show examples
 they must stay at home all day long.
For instance
Linking Words
, the feeling of sorrow
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 potential to
depressed
Add a missing verb
be depressed
show examples
 and it might be another problem that
causes
Wrong verb form
is caused
show examples
from
Change preposition
by
show examples
Use synonyms
lockdown
Correct article usage
the lockdown
show examples
. So
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
,
people
Use synonyms
 have to
aware
Add a missing verb
be aware
show examples
 of these negative impacts.
To sum up
Linking Words
, the positive impacts of
lockdown
Use synonyms
 are
more big
Replace the words
bigger
show examples
 than the disadvantages. To prevent the negative impacts, I would like to recommend
people
Use synonyms
 to
doing
Change the verb form
do
show examples
 some activities that can maintain their emotions to stay happy. By
this
Linking Words
, the countries will get the benefits
instead
Linking Words
 of the drawbacks.
Submitted by wishmeluck  on

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coherence cohesion
In your essay, it's important to ensure that your ideas flow logically from one to another. While your essay has a clear structure, there are areas where the ideas could connect more smoothly.
task achievement
Make sure to support your main points with more specific examples and detailed explanations. This will make your essay more convincing and richer in content.
overall improvement
Work on varying your sentence structures and using a wider range of vocabulary to improve the overall readability and sophistication of your essay. Additionally, some grammatical issues should be addressed to enhance clarity.
coherence cohesion
Your essay provides a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. This helps readers follow your argument easily.
task achievement
You did a good job of discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of the lockdown, which demonstrates a balanced understanding of the topic.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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