In the last decade, there has been a great increase in global air travel. What do you think are the reasons for this and do you think it is a good thing?
In recent
decade
, there has been a drastic rise observed in the Fix the agreement mistake
decades
air
transportation industry. Various reasons are pinpointed to explain this
phenomenon, and this
essay will explain two of the many factors, tourism
and international education
, that cause increasing
Add an article
an increasing
number
of air
travels
and justify my opinion towards Fix the agreement mistake
travel
this
positive trend.
One of the reasons that the
Correct article usage
apply
air
transportation are
now popular is that it is more affordable than ever before, and Change the verb form
is
this
Add a missing verb
has result
result
in a growing Replace the word
resulted
number
of people are
going on Unnecessary verb
apply
a
holiday overseas. A returned Correct article usage
apply
air
ticket from Phnom Penh to Bangkok can cost as little as less than US$100, making it ridiculously cheap for many.
Furthermore
, international education
also
plays a role in explaining why there are
Change the verb form
is
increasing
Add an article
an increasing
number
of human mobility through air
travel. Many people move abroad to pursue higher education
in hope
Correct article usage
the hope
to obtain
Change preposition
of obtaining
a
decent employment after graduation. Some even opt for the Remove the article
apply
far away
study destination to acquire optimal benefits from Add a hyphen
far-away
such
endeavor
. Correct article usage
an endeavor
Therefore
, they must take flights whenever they decide to move from their home country to the destination country or vice versa.
If it is for tourism
and education
, I believe it is a positive thing to have. Tourism
can help global
economy to strive as the more economic activities are carried out, the more money Add an article
the global
are
spent, contributing to the flow of financial resources around the world, and Change the verb form
is
at
the end, benefiting Change preposition
in
the
global economic development. Correct article usage
apply
Similarly
, participate
in Change the form of the verb
participating
education
abroad would generate countless advantages to
the students, whether it be for personal growth or professional development. The end result would be the quality human capital ready to participate actively in Change preposition
for
the
national and international development.
All in all, two main reasons why the Correct article usage
apply
number
of air
travels
Fix the agreement mistake
travel
have
increased in the past decades are Change the verb form
has
tourism
and international education
, and I believe it is a positive trend as it contributes to the
national and global economic prosperity and Correct article usage
apply
nation building
.Add a hyphen
nation-building
Submitted by emteeme on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
grammar
Work on sentence structure to avoid minor grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues. For example: 'A returned air ticket from Phnom Penh to Bangkok can cost as little as less than US$100.' should be 'A return air ticket from Phnom Penh to Bangkok can cost less than US$100.'
content development
Expand on your ideas slightly more to make them clearer and more comprehensive. For example, in discussing tourism, you could briefly touch on how affordable air travel has opened up new possibilities for middle-class families worldwide.
coherence
Use more transitional phrases to enhance the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs, such as 'In addition,' 'Moreover,' and 'As a result.' This will improve the overall coherence.
content strength
The essay offers clear, relevant points that support the main argument regarding the rise in air travel due to tourism and education.
structure strength
The introduction effectively sets up the topic, and the conclusion nicely summarizes the main points while reinforcing your opinion.
evidence strength
Examples provided, such as the cost of a ticket from Phnom Penh to Bangkok, are concrete and help illustrate your points well.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS
Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!