Some people think that governments should ban dangerous sports, while others think people should have freedom to do any sports or activity. Discuss both views and give your own opinion You should write at least 250 words.

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Some argue that extreme
sports
should be banned by governments,
others
Correct word choice
while others
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believe that
individuals
should have the freedom to engage in any
sport
or activity they choose.
For
Change preposition
From
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my perspective, I would argue that
individuals
have the right to participate in any
sport
or activity, and I disagree with the notion of banning dangerous
sports
. First and foremost, those who feel that dangerous
sports
,
such
as ice skiing, boxing, and skydiving should be banned, the primary concern is the risks of severe injuries and fatalities. These activities can have
significant
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a significant
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impact in several sectors, especially in healthcare
service
Fix the agreement mistake
services
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. The burden on the healthcare system, potentially
diminishing
Wrong verb form
diminishes
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the quality of care provided to patients
due to
limited facilities and staff.
However
, once the number of patients decreases, hospitals can manage their service more efficiently.
However
, despite the potential benefits of restricting dangerous
sports
, I argue that
individuals
should have the freedom to
choose
Verb problem
make
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their own choices regarding participation in
such
activities. Allowing people to engage in these
sports
can enhance their mental resilience.
For instance
, boxing is
the
Correct article usage
a
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sport
that helps
individuals
develop mental toughness and the ability to handle high-pressure situations, which can be valuable in real-life scenarios
such
as
self-defense
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self-defence
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during a robbery.
Furthermore
, extreme
sports
can contribute to economic growth.
For example
, bullfighting in Spain is a cultural
sport
that attracts tourists and boosts the local economy. In conclusion,
although
it is true that banning dangerous
sports
may offer some benefits to healthcare, I firmly believe that personal freedom is paramount. The mental resilience gained from participating in these
sports
and the economic benefits are significant reasons to allow
individuals
the right to choose their own activities.
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that the essay has a clear and logical structure. Although the essay does cover both viewpoints, the transitions between points could be smoother. You can use more linking phrases to improve the flow of ideas.
task achievement
Expand on some points to provide more comprehensive ideas. For instance, while you mention the economic benefits of extreme sports, a more detailed explanation could strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-presented, concisely capturing the main arguments and personal opinion.
task achievement
You have successfully addressed both views and supported your arguments with relevant specific examples.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • severe injuries
  • fatalities
  • base jumping
  • bull running
  • extreme skiing
  • safeguard
  • well-being
  • regulating
  • avoidable harm
  • healthcare costs
  • burdening
  • personal freedom
  • autonomy
  • training
  • equipment
  • mitigated
  • personal satisfaction
  • mental health benefits
  • resilience
  • adventure
  • assess risks
  • public safety
  • unnecessary healthcare costs
  • outright bans
  • balanced approach
  • stringent safety standards
  • mandatory training sessions
  • adequately informed
  • safeguarding
  • public health
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