IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Some customers are increasely choosing to buy goods that are produces in their local area, rather than imported goods. What are the reason for this ? is this positive or negative trend

#customers #goods #area #reason #trend
Undoubtedly, there has been a paradigm shift in export and import activities
due to
 globalization as compared to the bygone era. A handful of consumers are substantially selecting to purchase items that are generated in local markets,
instead
 of goods from another nation.
This
 will discuss plausible reasons
as well as
 describe its constructive development.
To begin
 with, among the countless rationales behind
this
 trend, the cardinal one is buyers are able to find
products
 at reasonable prices which are produced locally. To elucidate, items
produce
Wrong verb form
produced
show examples
 locally do not incorporate the cost involved in transportation, preservation and some additional taxes.
Moreover
, these
products
 are easily accessible to customers and they can be purchased in larger quantities as there are no restrictions.
For instance
, In India, Kiwi is a more expensive fruit as compared to any native-grown fruit as it is exported from New Zealand to India. Most individuals avoid purchasing
this
 fruit and render more preference to eatables which are grown at local farms.
Furthermore
,
this
 trend turns out to be beneficial for local papers as they are able to preserve their local heritage. By relentless pursuit of purchasing local
products
 allowed the craftsman to work hard and come up with new ideas related to the designs of any particular item in order to increase sales of their product.
Additionally
, those ideas are associated with history which assists them in preserving their history for a long period of time. By
following
this
 trend, the local artists are not able to face employment and the country is
also
 benefited as their cultural entity is being reserved. To cap it all, customers are producing more important locally produced
products
 because they are available at affordable prices as compared to exported
products
as well as
 they assist
to preserve
Change preposition
in preserving
show examples
 local heritage
Submitted by jashanpreetmann1515 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Try to avoid repetition and redundancy. For example, the phrase 'local heritage' is repeated, which can be rephrased for better clarity.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to enhance the support of your points. Citing specific studies, statistics, or well-known instances can make your arguments stronger.
coherence cohesion
Try to improve the clarity and flow of your ideas. Avoid using overly complex phrases or sentences when simpler ones can convey the message more effectively.
task achievement
The essay effectively highlights key reasons why people prefer local products over imported ones, and discusses its positive effects.
coherence cohesion
The introduction is clear and sets up the essay's purpose well. The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points discussed.
coherence cohesion
The essay demonstrates a good understanding of lexical resource with appropriate vocabulary usage.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: