The table shows data about underground railway systems in siz major cities with data opened, kilometres of route and passenger numbers per year in millions.

The table shows data about underground railway systems in siz major cities with data opened, kilometres of route and passenger numbers per year in millions.
The table illustrates information about
undergraud
Correct your spelling
underground
undergrad
railway
constructure
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construction
in
London
, Paris,
Tokyo
, Washington DC, Kyoto,
los
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Los
show examples
Angeles in three categories.
Overall
, it is clear from the table that
London
is the oldest one and
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
the longest route
tham
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than
others,
while
Tokyo
have
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has
show examples
the highest number of passengers per
year
.
London
have
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has
show examples
the oldest rail station
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
built in 1863, at the same point Paris and
Tokyo
are the
owner
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owners
show examples
of the older
railway
system
that
other
Correct pronoun usage
others
show examples
in
this
table with constructed in 1900 and 1927, respectively.
London
also
have
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has
show examples
the longest rail
system
at just under 400
kilometres
.
On the other hand
,
Tokyo
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
the most passengers per
year
with 1927 , following that Paris is second most in
this
category with
appproximately
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approximately
1200 passengers per
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
year
.
Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,
show examples
Los Angeles has the
uyoumgest
Correct your spelling
largest
underground
railway
system
opened at
year
2001 and Kyoto
has
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
the second
yong
Correct your spelling
young
rail station at the
year
1981.
However
, Washington DC have the longest
kilometres
of route with 126
kilometres
,
while
Kyoto has the shortest distance
railway
system
at just above 10
kilometres
.
Submitted by Kawasaki on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words railway, london, tokyo, year, system, kilometres with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

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