Unemployment is one of the biggest problems of contemporary society. What do you think are the main causes of unemployment? What solutions can you suggest?

#unemployment #society

this

day and age,

due to

many factors, unemployment

becomes

Wrong verb form

has become

show examples

a pressing issue in the entire world, leading to many demerits.

This

essay will clarify the reasons for

this

trend and provide some specific suggestions to overcome it. In the past, when many nations were still progressing gradually, most people were being blue-collar

laborers

Change the spelling

labourers

show examples

in factories, which did not require any advanced knowledge or qualifications to join the

labor

Change the spelling

labour

show examples

market.

Nevertheless

, in

this

modern day,

due to

the considerable development of science and technology, these jobs can be replaced by artificial intelligence and cutting-edge machines, leading to the fact that numerous manual workers are being sacked and losing their livelihoods. Undeniably,

this

trend demands employees to equip themselves with several qualifications and certificates from universities and courses, which costs prohibitively, to enhance the quality of

businesses’

Fix the agreement mistake

business’

show examples

undertakings.

As a result

, people with

financial

Change the adjective

financially

show examples

disadvantaged

background

Fix the agreement mistake

backgrounds

show examples

cannot afford it and might be forced to leave the job market. Even though solving

this

trend is

such

a conundrum, there are still some feasible measures to

encouter

Correct your spelling

encounter

counter

it.

First,

governments should invest more nations’ budgets into

education

, consisting of providing free tuition for all-aged students, and scholarships.

This

action can incentivize pupils to pursue a higher

education

by eliminating student debts and

equip

Wrong verb form

equipping

show examples

them with sufficient specialized knowledge that will be vital for their future career paths.

This

can be exemplified through the case of

German

Correct article usage

the German

show examples

educational system, which provides myriad scholarships for international students and free

education

for all citizens.

Second,

corporations and firms should ensure

basic

Correct article usage

the basic

show examples

privileges of

laborers

Change the spelling

labourers

show examples

such

supply

Wrong verb form

supplying

show examples

them with

occupational

Add an article

an occupational

the occupational

show examples

accident and health

insurances

Fix the agreement mistake

insurance

show examples

As a result

, workers will be more willing to

enroll

Change the spelling

enrol

show examples

in the job market, lowering the total rate of unemployment. In conclusion, unemployment is a contemporary puzzle that

need

Change the verb form

needs

show examples

to be tackled to ensure the stability of a nation. Resolving it not only

need

Correct subject-verb agreement

needs

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

action from the governments but

also

from

business

Fix the agreement mistake

businesses

show examples

, guaranteeing to provide the basic benefits of workers and accessible

education

Submitted by anhnguyen270407 on Wed Jul 24 2024

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task achievement

While the essay provides a clear understanding of the causes and solutions for unemployment, make sure to elaborate on each point further to provide a more comprehensive response.

coherence cohesion

Work on refining the logical flow between paragraphs and sentences. Using transitions and linking words can improve the overall cohesion.

coherence cohesion

The essay is well-structured with a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps guide the reader through your arguments.

task achievement

The points made in the essay are supported by relevant examples, which strengthens the overall argument.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

333 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Unemployment is one of the biggest problems of contemporary society. What do you think are the main causes of unemployment? What solutions can you suggest?

Your opinion

These days people spend more and more time at work and less time at home. What are advantages and disadvantages of this?

Some people think that paying tax is their only duty, while others believe that we have more responsibilities toward society. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You were absent from an important event held by the company you work for. Write a letter to your manager

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training) Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish.