Some parents give their children everything that their children ask for or allow them to do whatever they want to do. Is this good for children? What could be the consequences for these children when they grow up?
It is a common
belif
that it is essential to let their children do everything they want. Correct your spelling
belief
However
, I strongly believe that just allowing everything is harmful to young individuals because they cannot grow up independently.
It is evident that providing everything children desire is definitely harmful for several reasons. The most conspicuous one lies in the fact that it can develop negative behaviors
, Change the spelling
behaviours
such
as a sense of entitlement. it can develop negative behaviors
, Change the spelling
behaviours
such
as a sense of entitlement. Another reason is that it cannot make young people
independent. Without parents, they cannot make a decision themselves and it will be a serious problem. This
kind of parenting style can lead to negative impacts on the children's growth and development.
It does not seem unreasonable to suggest that if young people
can get everything they want in their childhood, they certainly will have several problems when they become adults. The most conspicuous one lies in the fact that they may be struggling with building relationships with other people
. It is also
worth noting that it can be challenging for them to have some difficulties, especially in their workplace. This
is especially true among people
who are having trouble with teamwork. Needless to say, this
parenting style brings adverse effects to children’s personalities, especially in their adulthood.
In conclusion, it is clear that
parents sometimes should not accept young people
’s requests to prevent some detrimental elements in children’s future. Otherwise
, this
can lead to harmful results, such
as having difficulties at their workplace, or establishing hard relationships with other people
when they are grown up.Submitted by hmhy0326 on
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task achievement
It is good that you have clearly stated your position. However, providing more specific examples would strengthen your argument. Try to include anecdotal or hypothetical situations where children, given everything they want, face difficulties later in life.
coherence cohesion
You have a logical structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, ensure that there is no repetition of phrases like 'develop negative behaviors' which was repeated in the first body paragraph.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are clear and well-structured, establishing and summarizing your points effectively.
task achievement
You have successfully highlighted the potential negative impacts of permissive parenting on children's future development.
Your opinion
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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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